FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: sports.espn.go.com

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BASEBALL TRIVIA \ QUOTES
ESPN columnist identifies his choices for worst contracts in baseball history
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Click here to view ===> WORST CONTRACTS IN BASEBALL
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: crudefutures.typepad.com

BASEBALL SLANG
Includes comments citing sexual innuendos in baseball slang
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Click here to view ===> BASEBALL SLANG
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: liverpoolway.co.uk

ENGLISH FOOTBALL (SOCCER) QUOTES \ CHANTS
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Questions & answers:
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Reporter: "Have you ever thought about a career in the media?"
Roy Keane: "No, no. I want a proper job."
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Manish Bhasin: "There's a story that Ruud van Nistelrooy may sign for Spurs. Do you think that might happen?"
Gavin Peacock: "No. He's a top striker." Ow.
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Matt Cooper: "Is there any chance that Charlton could beat Chelsea?"
Tony Cascarino: "In a word, I don't think so."
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Reporter: "When do you stop thinking about relegation and start thinking about Europe?
Paul Jewell: "After about 10 pints."
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"I sent around a text message saying 'this is Gary Neville's new mobile number'. A few minutes later, my phone beeped with a reply saying: 'so what?' That was Roy's sense of humour."
- Gary Neville revealing how much he is missed by his former skipper.
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Click here to view ==> QUOTES AND CHANTS
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: dailymail.co.uk

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SPORTS QUOTES

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"I'm not into all this fame stuff. I'd rather do my gardening than drive fast cars. I've just got my first sponsored car in 14 years. My first one was a Fiat Punto and my mate used it to do his pizza deliveries in"

-- Clinton Woods insists not all boxers are obsessed with 'bling'.

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Click here to view ===> SPORTS QUOTES

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: noeman.org

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SPORTS QUOTES

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"Built like Tarzan, plays like Jane."

Ricky Ponting jokes with commentators when Shaun Tait decided not to try to field a ball off his own bowling against South Africa

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"My missus could have scored that."

Harry Redknapp puts a friendly arm around striker Darren Bent after his glaring miss against Portsmouth.

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"Agbonlahor had no team-mates to pass to so he shot himself."

MOTD commentator on a recent Aston Villa game.

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"He's got 10 already, and I still expect him to get into double figures."

Andy Ritchie talking about Cristiano Ronaldo's goalscoring prowess on MUTV.

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Click here to view ===> SPORTS QUOTES

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: stltoday.com

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BASEBALL QUOTES
Baseball quotes cited on a St. Louis Cardinal baseball forum
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When I was 10 or 11 I was reading one of the season previews in some publication and talking about one teams pitching had this to say about one starter:
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Bob Walk, couldn't be more aptly named if he were called Bob Enormousearnedrunaverage.
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Andujar when questioned why he wasn't stretching - "Babe Ruth never stretched".
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Ian Snell on facing Albert Pujols :
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"When I face him, I try not to think about what I'm going to do. Because I know he knows what I'm thinking."
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On best way to pitch to Stan Musial:
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"I would throw him my best pitch and back up third base."
Carl Erskine
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"I would throw him 4 wide ones and try to pick him off first."
Don Drysdale
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"Jim Pagliaroni joined the club tonight and is going to be a welcome addition. He was describing a girl that one of the ballplayers had been out with and said, 'It's hard to say exactly what she looked like. She was kind of a Joe Torre with ---.'
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This joke can only be explained with a picture of Joe Torre. But I'm not sure any exist - he dissolves camera lenses."
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-- Jim Bouton, Ball Four
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"Why throw 4 pitches when you can throw 1?"
Randy Johnson on walking a guy
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"That guy always hits a grand slam with the bases loaded."
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"If the batter didn't see it, how did the ump?" on a Bob Gibson called strike 3 fastball.
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"That's a really high sky today, more so than normal."
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(Last 3 quotes are from Yogi's brother, Razz (smile))
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FUINNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: boards.chicagobears.com

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NFL FOOTBALL QUOTES

NFL quotes from yesteryear cited on a football forum's message boards

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Philadelphia Eagles head coach Buddy Ryan talking about RB Earnest Jackson
"Trade him for a six pack....it doesn't even have to be cold "

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Mike Ditka (about starting qb)
"Whoever starts, starts! Whoever doesn't backs him up!

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Mike Holmgren
"My pee-wee team can run this play better than you guys! And I pay them in popsicles, not millions of dollars!"

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Matt Hasselbeck
"OW! I just got stung by a bee!"

(Walks over to trainer) "Do I pee on it?"

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"I'd like to go get my Magnum and blow his I luv my behind away"

- Otis Wilson in response to Green Bay's Charles Martin after a dirty hit on Jim McMahon

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Jets coach from about 20 years ago (I can't remember if it was Kotite or someone else) in his press conference after a loss.

"There are 3 kinds of running backs. The kind that run over trees .... the kind that run around trees .... and the kind we have. They run into trees."

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Florida A&M coach from years ago on what he looked for in new recruits:

(Editor's note: The coach pronounced each requirement to rhyme with mile)

"They must be a-gile, mo-bile, and hos-tile!"

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: tabletennis.gr

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TABLE TENNIS TRIVIA
Most intesresting table tennis trivia:
Most popular sports participation game in the world
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More table tennis trivia:
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The difference between ping-pong and table tennis is that "Ping-Pong" is a trademark belonging to JJaques &Son in Britain and to Parker Bros in the US, so it's only ping-pong if you're using their kit.
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Click here to view ===> EVEN MORE TABLE TENNIS TRIVIA
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