FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: chatterfromthedugout.com

BASEBALL QUOTES
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“I came into this game sane, and I want to leave
it sane.”
-Why Don Baylor, outfielder, DH, and manager,
refused to take the manager’s job when offered
by New York Yankees owner George Steinbrenner
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“It was a beautiful thing to observe all 36 oars
working in unison.”
-Announcer Jack Buck on George Steinbrenner’s
new yacht
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Click here to view ===> BASEBALL QUOTES
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: fightfranchise.com

BOXING QUOTES
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George Chuvalo’s best punch is a left cheek to the right glove.
--- Larry Merchant
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Hard? Hell no it wasnt hard. Anyody who can live with the same woman for 4 months can act.
--- Tex Cobb On acting
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My girlfriend boos when we make love because she knows it turns me on.
--- Hector Comacho (1989)
.
Rocky Marciano didn't know enough boxing to know what a feint was. He never tried to out-guess you. He just kept trying to knock your brains out.
--- Archie Moore
.
Click here to view ===> BOXING QUOTES
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: footballbabble.com

Image: prisonplanet.com

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NFL FOOTBALL QUOTES

Football web site presents 101 NFL football quotes

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“In the long run, the cream always rises and the crap always sinks.”

(John Elway)
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“I normally run the 40-yard dash in 4.9, but when a 280-pound guy is chasing me, I run it in 4.6.”

(John Elway)
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“Now that I’m retired, I want to say that all defensive linemen are sissies.”

(Dan Fouts)

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Click here to view ===> 101 NFL FOOTBALL QUOTES

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: golftoday.co.uk

GOLF QUOTES
A golf web site presents golf quotes by and about caddies
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Caddies are a breed of their own. If you shoot 66, they say, "Man, we shot 66!" But go out and shoot 77, and they say "Hell, he shot 77!"
--- Lee Trevino
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I know you can be fined for throwing a club, but I want to know if you can get fined for throwing a caddie?
--- Tommy Bolt
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Click here to view ===> GOLF QUOTES
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: triplem.com.au

SPORTS QUOTES
A sports web site presents a slide show of 23 sports quotes
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"I don't know who started it, but I remember I called him ugly and he got pretty upset, so he called me fat."
--- Montreal ice hockey defenceman Josh Gorges, trying to defend a fight at practise with a team mate.
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Click here to view ===> SPORTS QUOTES SLIDE SHOW
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: therunningadvisor.com

Image: thedilbertstore.com

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RUNNING QUOTES

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Related topic: Track and Field

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"Why aren't you signed up for the 401K?

I'd never be able to run that far."

- Scott Adams, Dilbert (4/2/01)

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Click here to view ===> RUNNING QUOTES

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: wediditforlove.com

DRAG RACING QUOTES
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"I know that son-of-a-bitch is cheatin! Cause, I'm cheatin and he beat me"!
--- Unknown from long ago.
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"At Lions one night, I was on a strong pass and about half track I saw a blower belt go past me, then about 3/4 down track, I saw another blower belt go by. Then as I pulled off the track I noticed I didn't have any front tires either"
--- Retired Top Fuel driver Walt Stevens.
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"Hell, If it was easy anybody could do it and it wouldn't be called Racing!" This is what I tell most of the drivers who have had a bad run of luck or are paying their dues to become true racers.
--- Bruce Pedretti/TopWop Chowchilla Chicken Chokers
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Click here to view ===> DRAG RACING QUOTES
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: jamaica-gleaner.com

TIGER WHO???

Image: static.stomp.com.sg

GOLF HUMOR

Jokes, not quotes, about Tiger Woods' recent social shenanigans.

“Comedy is tragedy that happens to other people.”

Source: Angela Carter \ whatquote.com

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A sports \ humorist blogger presents his views on Tiger's marital problems.

"In a very perverse way, while we like Tiger and feel sorry for him, we also like the jokes. Humour works like that - it is no respecter of persons or feelings. Even the sickest jokes find a spot in our psyche that they hit. Take some of the Tiger jokes that have been circulating:"

Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.

What's the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.

Tiger Woods wasn't seriously injured in the crash, but he's still below par.

What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went clubbing.

Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn't decide between a wood and an iron.

Perhaps Tiger should be using a driver?

This is the first time Tiger's ever failed to drive 300 yards

Apparently, Tiger admitted this crash was the closest shave he's ever had. So Gillette has dropped his contract.

Apparently, the only person who can beat Tiger Woods with a golf club is his wife.

Might have been worse Tiger, you could have lost your putter!

What course gives Tiger the most trouble? A: Intercourse.

You usually find a tree in the Woods, Tiger's wife found a Woods in a tree.

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Here is yet another joke from a Baltimore radio sports

talk show host on a late evening show on 12/11/2009:

"Tiger is the only golfer I know who plays 18 holes

during a game and 18 holes afterwards."

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REMINDER:

Sports_nut is just the messenger, so no emails on this one, please!

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