Image: ldcsb.on.ca.
INSULTS TO SQUELCH ATTACKING RIVAL FANS' INSULTS
Has that New York Yankess fan finally plucked your last nerve, Bosox fan?
What about that Heat fan, Mavericks fan?
Or that Cowboys fan, Redskins fan?
Let others know what you REALLY think of them at that sporting event!
Here are witty put-downs and squelches of people who deserve it:
.
A demitasse would fit his head like a sombrero.
.
A guy with your IQ should have a low voice too!
.
And there he was: reigning supreme at number two.
.
Any friend of yours ... is a friend of yours.
.
Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you worse advice.
.
Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?
.
Are your parents siblings?
.
As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?
.
As useless as rubber lips on a woodpecker.
.
As welcome as a rattlesnake at a square dance.
.
Better at sex than anyone, now all he needs is a partner.
.
Calling you stupid would be an insult to stupid people.
.
Do you have to leave so soon? I was about to poison the tea.
.
Do you want me to accept you as you are or do you want me to like you?
.
Doesn't know the meaning of the word fear, but then again he doesn't know the meaning of most words.
.
Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent!
.
Don't you need a license to be that ugly?
.
Don't you realize that there are enough people to hate in the world already without your working so hard to give us another?
.
Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.
.
Excellent time to become a missing person.
.
Forgot to pay his brain bill.
.
Has reached rock bottom and shows signs of starting to dig.
.
Has the IQ of lint.
.
He can think without moving his lips!
.
He does the work of three men: Moe, Larry, and Curly.
.
He doesn't know whether to scratch his watch or wind his butt.
.
He is dark and handsome. When it's dark, he's handsome.
.
He is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
.
He is the kind of a man that you would use as a blueprint to build an idiot.
.
He smells the coffee, but can't find the pot.
.
Heard your family went to a restaurant where they serve crabs just so they could bring you along.
.
Hello - tall, dark and obnoxious!
.
Here's a dollar. Call all your friends and bring back some change!
.
He's the only man who, if told to screw himself, could do it.
.
He's the reason brothers and sisters shouldn't marry.
.
Hey, act your age -- senile!
.
His brain waves fall a little short of the beach.
.
His suitcase doesn't have a handle.
.
I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
.
I don't mind that you are talking so long as you don't mind that I'm not listening.
.
I hear the only place you're ever invited is outside.
.
I worship the ground that awaits you.
.
I would ask you how old you are but I know you can't count that high.
.
I would have liked to insult you, but with your intelligence you wouldn't get offended.
.
I wouldn't piss in his ear if his brain was on fire!
.
I'd like to give you a going-away present ... but you have to do your part.
.
If brains were rain, you`d be a desert.
.
If I ever need a brain transplant, I'd choose yours because I'd want a brain that had never been used.
.
If I promise to miss you, will you go away?
.
If I want your stupid opinion, I'll beat it out of you.
.
If idiots could fly, this would be an airport.
.
If manure were music, you'd be a brass band.
.
If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you get change back.
.
I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
.
I'm not as dumb as you look.
.
You're so ugly, you had tinted windows on your incubator.
.
I've had many cases of love that were just infatuation, but this hate I feel for you is the real thing.
.
I've only got one nerve left, and you're getting on it.
.
Keep talking. I always yawn when I'm interested.
.
Nobody says that you are dumb. They just say you were sixteen years old before you learned how to wave good-bye.
.
Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
.
People say that you are the perfect idiot. I say that you are not perfect but you are doing all right.
.
Perhaps your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
.
She's so ugly, she'd make a freight train take a dirt road!
.
Sit down and give your mind a rest.
.
So stupid, he moves his lips when watching TV.
.
Somebody else is doing the driving for that boy!
.
The going got weird and he turned pro.
.
The next time you shave, could you stand a little closer to the razor?
.
The twinkle in his eyes is actually the sun shining between his ears.
.
The wheel is still spinning but the hamster died.
There is no vaccine against stupidity.
.
They shot him through the stupid forest, and he didn't miss a tree.
.
Thinking isn't your strong suit, is it?
.
Too bad stupidity isn't painful.
.
We do not complain about your shortcomings but about your long stayings.
.
We heard that when you ran away from home your folks sent you a note saying, "Do not come home and all will be forgiven."
.
We'll get along fine as soon as you realize I'm God.
.
What color is the sky in your world?
.
What he lacks in intelligence, he more than makes up for in stupidity.
.
Whatever anyone says to you goes in one ear and out the other because nothing is blocking traffic.
.
When you fell out of the ugly tree, you hit every branch on the way down.
.
Whom am I calling "stupid"? I don't know. What's your name?
.
You are living proof that manure can grow legs and walk.
.
You are so dumb you sit on the TV and watch the sofa.
.
You are so stupid you got hit by a parked car
.
You are such a smart-ass I bet you could sit on a carton of ice cream and tell what flavor it is.
.
You should be the poster child for birth control.
.
You're so dumb you thought Taco Bell was a phone company.
.
You're so stupid you threw a rock at the ground and missed.
.
You're so ugly when you went to a haunted house they offered you a job.
.
You're so ugly you have to trick or treat over the phone.
.
You're so ugly you make blind kids cry.
No comments:
Post a Comment