SPECIAL EDITORIAL NOTE FROM SPORTS_NUT, 2/26/2011
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Welcome to the retirement edition of Funny Sports Quotes.
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The Funny Sports Quotes blog was created in 11/2007 after I could see I could become a blogger very easily using Google's 3-step process for creating a blog online.
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For me, like most, work is not my idea of a fun experience, so I had to choose the topic that I would most enjoy pursuing and that, for me, was finding and posting funny sports quotes for entertaining and, in some cases, educating an audience on facets of sports even the most ardent sports fans may not have been aware of.
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At the same time, I decided to compile a database of funny sports quotes that sports fans and quote fans could visit for "one-stop" shopping, thereby helping them to avoid the need to search elsewhere for sports quotes.
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So, from 11/2007 until 2/2011. I have compiled quotes on the Funny Sports Quotes blog and its sister blog, FSQuotes, that is accessible only from the Funny Sports Quotes blog.
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As of 2/26/2011, I believe I have achieved my objective first set in 11/2007, which signals for me the end of my funny sports quotes database project.
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Kindly note that I have already made the last post (SI Swimsuit) to the blog, shut off further entries to Comments, and I will shut off the email address sports.quotes@gmail.com on 03/14/2011.
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Also note that many features previously cited on this page have been removed, so that a bare-bones FSQ remains for your future reference.
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I do hope that my venture was successful in bringing a smile to your face or a skip to your step, since that was all FSQ was created for, your entertainment and pleasure.
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In closing, I wish you and yours, Godspeed!
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Monday, March 17, 2008

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: bostonbombardment.com

The Definitive List of Dodgeball Throws
September 02nd, 2007 | Category: Strategy

The definitive list of effective throwing methods in dodgeball / bombardment:

Throw-up: An amazing yet simple process of throwing one ball into the air towards an opponent then striking him out with another ball. A variation of the throw-up is the have another teammate throw the ball up from a different direction then striking the opponent out yourself.

Curve-out: This throw takes a lot of practice for accuracy but it proves to be one of the most effective throws in dodgeball. Start off by placing the dodgeball in between your hand and forearm. In one sweeping motion, throw the ball side arm and let it slide off your finger tips. The ball will literally curve in and then out! The best curve-out players will tell you that the primary method to aim is to throw the ball 3 feet to the right or left (depending on righty or lefty thrower) of the target.

Floater: An underestimated method of finishing off an opponent. Proceed to throw the ball overhand (see Fastball) and at the point of releasing the ball from your hand, let it slightly curve off the tips of your fingers. This will make the ball appear moving fast but in reality it will be delayed around 1.5 seconds. The beauty of this dodgeball throw is that the opponent often reaches out to catch it and after their arms fold around thin air, the ball hits their fore arms.

Fastball: A very typical throw in dodgeball games, the key is to concentrate on a particular target. Clutch the ball and throw it like a typically baseball pitcher would. Follow through with your through to ensure speed. Make sure not to underestimate how light a dodgeball can be, thus "throwing out" your arm for the next week.

Spinless: This throw is the closest you can get to a knuckle-ball in bombardment. You definitely need large hands to pull it off. Grasp the ball in your palm and extend your arm straight out to your side. Like a catapult, swing your arm straight and simply release the ball at the right moment. This will have the ball go very fast with No spin whatsoever. With no spin, the ball typically does some crazy motions while in flight.

High-low: While having a face-off with opponent, proceed to throw the ball with your arm releasing the ball at the furthest position possible. On release of the ball, send it in a severely angled direction towards their feet. While they expect to catch the ball around the head or midlevel, you will effective catch them off guard. Use this method sparingly since the opponents will catch on and will start catching low.

Low-high: Throw the ball in an upwards swinging motion, such as a sidearm or softball-style throw. As the swoop low to catch the ball, the trajectory should land squarely in the face.

Suicide Shot: This throw is among the highly difficult moves to successfully pull off. Basically when there is only 1 opponent left on a team, the player will run full force with ball in hand. Once reaching the boundary line he will jump over the line and throw ball towards opponent mid air. Once the player lands on the other teams side they are automatically out.

Cross Fire: Player stays near the fence, often holding ball behind his back even though everyone knows he has one. When players on the opposite side of the court enter the neutral zone throwing toward teammates, the sideline player takes him out from the side. This tactic can be neutralized by good team communication and spreading out cover fire to disallow the sideline player to make a move without being thrown at. It is effective when the thrower is not seen and an opposing player is hit by surprise.

The Gazelle: When an opposing player advances through the neutral zone and finishing throwing all ammunition, the Gazelle sprints toward the player attempting to trap him in the neutral zone without any cover fire to help him.

Firing Squad: Used in two different capacities, this technique is used to aim all fire at one specific player. It is often used when there are very few players left on one team, or in the beginning of a game when one team controls the majority of balls and wishes to take out skilled players.

The Stand Off: When ammunition is split evenly and the squads have even amounts of players remaining, oftentimes one team will advance through the neutral zone while the other retreats. This can last hours on end while players that have been ousted stand on the side line freezing and agitated by the lack of action. This is very common in the BSB as the skill level of players is extremely high which causes extreme amounts of caution in all players.

The Sacrificial Lamb: In an advantage situation (4 v 2, 5 v 3, etc.) one player rushes at a player in the neutral zone firing early and attracting the fire of the opposing player, while another comes from behind to take out the opposition.

The J Shot: Yet to appear in the BSB games, an infamous move during the epic Teen Camp battles. Player would Junk or "J" Shot and opponent with a fully inflated dodgeball causing severe and irrepressible agony.
While game slows for a minute in respect of the fallen player, everyone is quietly laughing inside.

The T.K.O.: When a player is tagged out by a ball, he proceeds to throw the ball back at opponent out of rage despite needing to exit the court. Once player is on the sideline, he begins to pound the fence yelling "what the heck" and frowning for a few minutes. This occurs several times per game. The purpose is to intimidate opponents from making the mistake of hitting him ever again.

The McGuirk: Get everyone really mad at you and therefore making it a lot of fun and more competitive… awesomeness.

The Shot Put: This is when you spin in a 360* motion and release it. its not that effective but power is its essence [Thanks Dan Langhans!!]

Fake-out: The Player has their hand behind their back, as if to hide a ball; Buddied up with a teammate who actually does have a ball. The fake ball holder, goes through the motions of throwing "the ball". When the opponent dodges, jumps, flinches, dives or tries to block; the real ball holder nails him unsuspecting.



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