FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: sportingnews.com

BRAIN ANATOMY 101

Image: media-2.web.britannica.com

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SPORTS TRIVIA \ QUOTES

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The Sporting News selects the 20 smartest athletes in sports.

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Click here to view ===> 20 SMARTEST ATHLETES IN SPORTS

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: sportspickle.com

SPORTS HUMOR
Web site selects its choices for the 25 all-time best nicknames in sports
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Click here to view ===> 25 BEST NICKNAMES IN SPORTS
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: See body of message

Image: teesforall.com
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SPORTS HUMOR
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Part I:
Blogger presents his choices of the 10 best jokes about Tiger Woods'
extramarital affairs.
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Click here to view ===> THE TIGER WOODS SAGA
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Source: examiner.com
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Part II:
Website presents Ceorge Carlin's take on a variety of sports.
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Bowling is not a sport because you have to rent the shoes.
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Boxing is not a sport. Boxing is a way to beat the shit out of somebody. In that respect, boxing is a more sophisticated form of hockey. But beating the shit out of somebody isn't a sport, in spite of what the police think. When police brutality becomes an Olympic event, fine, then boxing can become a sport.
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Don't you find it funny that all these tough-guy boxers are fighting over a purse?
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How come none of these boxers seem to have a losing record?
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Gymnastics is not a sport because Romanians are good at it! Took me a long time to come up with that one, but by God, I thought of one.
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Hockey is not a sport. Hockey is three activities going on at the same time: ice skating, playing with a puck, and beating the shit out of somebody.
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It's never just a game when you're winning.
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Running isn't a sport 'cause everybody can do it. Anything we can all do can't be a sport. I can run, you can run. My mother can run … you don't see her on the cover of Sports Illustrated, do you?
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Source: en.wikiquote.com
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: See body of message

DEBBI FIELDS

FOUNDER, MRS. FIELDS COOKIES

Image: dlisted.com

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BASEBALL QUOTES

Web site presents quotes by and about former baseball team owner Charlie Finley

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Click here to view ===> BASEBALL QUOTES

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Source: espn.go.com

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Bonus: Baseball-related trivia about former baseball team owner

Charlie Finley.

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Memorable Charlie Finley baseball experiments:

-- He named a mule Charlie O. and made it the Kansas City A's mascot.

-- Had baseballs delivered to the umpire behind home plate by a mechanical rabbit that popped out of the ground.

-- Had cookies delivered to umpires during games. The cookies were made by A's employee Debbie Fields, who turned the chocolate-chip recipe into the "Mrs. Fields" empire.

-- Hired as a bat boy Stanley Burrell, who became rap star M.C. Hammer.

-- Finley advocated orange baseballs, which were tried briefly in exhibitions. Tried to speed up games by reducing walks to three balls.

-- He paid $300 to each player who agreed to wear a mustache. His A's were first team to wear white shoes.

-- Two of his ideas became standards of the game - the designated hitter and night World Series games.
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Source: freelibrary.com
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Bonus: Video of M. C. Hammer (Ex-bat boy for the A's baseball team)
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Youngsters (50 years old and younger), put on your dancing shoes!
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Seniors (Older than 50), stand fast!!!
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"LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!"
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Click here to view ===> M C HAMMER MUSIC VIDEO
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Source: youtube.com
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: thefastertimes.com

SURFING MODEL: BETHANY HAMILTON

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Image: nationalgeographic.com

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SURFING HUMOR

Blogger presents his 100 reasons for choosing surfing as his favorite sport.

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Editor's note:

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Many of the 100 reasons may be familiar only to other surfers, so,

keep that in mind while you view the blogger's list.

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Click here to view ===> SURFING HUMOR

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BONUS SURFER-RELATED VIDEO:

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Youngsters (blog readers 50 years old and younger). put on your dancing shoes!

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Seniors (readers older than 50), stand fast!!!

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Dancers, get ready to dance along with the Family Guy and his

cartoon friends as they dance to a surfer novelty song from the

1960's by The Trashmen.

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"LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!"

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Click here to view ===> FAMILY GUY DANCES TO SURFER NOVELTY SONG

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Source: youtube.com

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: imdb.com

Image: moviecritic.com.au
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CRICKET QUOTES
Web site presents cricket quotes in a cricket sports movie released in 2001
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Plot summary for the movie Lagaan (2001):
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This is the story about the resilience shown by the Indians when they were under the British Rule.
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They are already taxed to the bone by the British and their cronies, but when Jack Russell announces that he will double the Lagaan (tax) from all villagers, they decide to oppose it.
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Leading the villagers is a handsome young man named Bhuvan, who challenges them to a game of cricket, a game that is to be played by veteran British cricket players, versus villagers, including Bhuvan himself, who have never played this game before, and do not even know a bat from a piece of wood.
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As the challenge is accepted, the interest grows and attracts Indians from all over the region, as well as the British from all over the country - as everyone gathers to see the 'fair play' that the British will display against their counter-parts, who are aided by none other than the sister, Elizabeth, of Captain Rusell.
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Written by Sumitra (corrected by Sonia)
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Trailer for the movie Lagaan (2001):
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Click here to view ===> LAGAAN MOVIE TRAILER
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Selected quotes from the movie Lagaan (2001):
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Lakha: See how badly hurt I am?
Gauri: Hurt? It's my father you need. Not me.
Father? Lakha has cut his hand.
Ishwar: He seems to cut his hand more than he cuts wood.
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Click here to view ===> LAGAAN MOVIE QUOTES
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: pakpassion.net

Image: caricaturelondon.files.wordpress.com

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CRICKET QUOTES

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"The hallmark of a great captain is the ability to win the toss at the right time"
- Richie Benaud
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"That slow-motion replay doesn't show how fast the ball was travelling"
- Richie Benaud
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"How can you tell your wife you are just popping out to play a match and then not come back for five days?"
- Rafa Benitez struggling to come to terms with Test cricket
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Click here to view ===> CRICKET QUOTES
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: wrestling-edge.com

Image: askeletoninyourcloset.com

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WRESTLING QUOTES

Blogger presents his favorite wrestling quotes

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I’ll kick your teeth so far down your throat you can chew your own ass up for pissing me off.

The Undertaker

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I can’t jump high so I jump from high places
Mick Foley
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So you like picking on women, huh? So why don’t you pick on me?
Kevin Nash (evidently confused about his gender) to Test
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Heenan: That’s my second favourite song.
Monsoon: I’m almost afraid to ask. Whats your favourite?
Heenan: All the rest are tied.
Bobby Heenan commenting on Hulk Hogan’s entrance music
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I would rather hurt a man than love a woman
Mick Foley (as Cactus jack)
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Hardy Boys, Boyz with a ‘Z’. Is that Z supposed to scare us or something?
Christian
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What are you talking about you frosty haired reekazoid?
Christian to Michael Cole
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As times goes by, as times goes by, they say “he’s washed up”, “he’s finished”, “he’s a loser”, “he’s all through”. You know what? The only one that’s going to tell me when I’m through doing my thing is you people here.
Mickey Rourke as “The Ram” in the movie The Wrestler
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God, this is Billy. I just won the King of the Ring, but everyone still hates me because I absolutely suck!
The Rock
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I became the first ever Euro-continental champion in WWF history. Well, besides D-Lo Brown, but he doesn’t count.
Kurt Angle
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Undertaker, if that is your real name…
Kurt Angle
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I was dating a guy that was a huge wrestling fan and I’m embarrassed to say it now but I used to make fun of him for watching it.
Torrie Wilson
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Wrestling is ballet with violence.
Jesse Ventura
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The only reason you were WWE Champion for almost a year was because Triple H didn’t want to work Tuesdays.
Paul Heyman to JBL
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I have balls the size of grapefruits, and come this Sunday you’ll be spitting out the seeds!
Vince McMahon
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The frequencies in my head are not known to normals…
Ultimate Warrior, hitting the nail on the head
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Girls, you can’t be the first, but you can be next.
Ric Flair
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That’ll make your back crack, your liver quiver and your knees freeze.
Dusty Rhodes
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You’ve got a lot of class, and it’s all low.
The Rock
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Just when you think you know the answers, I change the questions.
Roddy Piper

This is what we thought was John’s room but there was wrestling boots and since John can’t wrestle I wasn’t sure.
Edge (at John Cena’s home)
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I have resolved to wake up an hour earlier each day so I can hate you just a little bit longer.
William Regal
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: Original

INES SAINZ

NEW YORK JETS FOOTBALL REPORTER

Image: bleacherreport.net
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SPORTS TRIVIA \ HUMOR
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OOPS!!! Harassment in the Jets Locker Room!
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DO THE MATH!!!
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Sorry, Roger, but boys will be boys - still want the job???
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: epagina.com

MIA ST.JOHN

PROFESSIONAL BOXER

Image: bleacherreport.net
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SPORTS PICTORIAL
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Top 10 sexy female athletes that appeared in Playboy
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Sorry for all the eye candy, but, somebody has to show it
and sports humor sites have chosen that unenviable task.
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So, with that most humble apology,
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"LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!"
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Click here to view ===> TOP TEN FEMALE ATHLETES IN PLAYBOY
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: See body of message

REX RYAN, HEAD COACH

NEW YORK JETS

Image: assets.nydailynews.com

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AMERICAN FOOTBALL QUOTES \ TRIVIA \ HUMOR

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Part I: Quotes by Rex Ryan

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Click here to view ===> NFL QUOTES

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Source: cippinonsports.com

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Part II: American Football Trivia: Trick Plays in Football

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Click here to view ===> TRICK PLAYS

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Source: footballbabble.com

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Part III: American Football Humor: Street Football

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Click here ===> STREET FOOTBALL BY BILL COSBY

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Source: youtube.com

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: therapup.net

BASKETBALL QUOTES
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10 Memorable Quotes from the NBA Finals (2010)
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Click here to view ===> BASKETBALL QUOTES
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: See body of message

Image: borders.com.au

Image: ecx.images-amazon.com

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GAMBLING QUOTES

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Part I: Casino Gambling

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“When we put 50 machines in, I consider them 50 more mousetraps. You have to have a mousetrap to catch a mouse.”

– Bob Stupak, former Las Vegas casino owner.

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Noting his mother’s visit to Las Vegas the weekend before she died. “She got to go to heaven four days early.”

– President Bill Clinton.

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“Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.”

– George Ade

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“If I had the money and the drinking capacity, I’d probably live at a roulette table and let my life go to hell.”

– Michael Ventura

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Click here to view ===> CASINO QUOTES

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Source: sportsbookveteran.com

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Part II: Horse Racing Gambling

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Plot Summary for Let It Ride (1989)
An average kind of guy who has a slight problem with gambling goes to the track, and mystically, it seems as though he can't lose, no matter how he bets; and he has an incredible day. Written by Kathy Li
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Let It Ride Movie Quotes:
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Jay Trotter: [puts $2400 in cash on the counter] Let it ride!
Ticket Seller: What's the number?
Jay Trotter: [smile fades away]
Ticket Seller: It's a house rule! You've got to give me a number!

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Jay Trotter: [puts the box with $69,000 in cash on the counter] Let it ride!
Ticket Seller: Is it all there?
Jay Trotter: I took out a little for the wife and a few things, but basically, yeah, it's all there!
Ticket Seller: I can't give you win tickets for that! That's over 1300 win tickets! It will jam up the machine!
Ticket Seller: [leans forward]
Ticket Seller: The counting room!

- - - - -
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Click here to view ===> HORSE RACING QUOTES
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Source: imdb.com
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: onthebaseline.com

CAROLINE WOZNIACKI

PROFESSIONAL TENNIS PLAYER

Image: tennisgrandstand.com
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TENNIS QUOTES

Best Tennis Quotes of the 2010 US Open
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Requested to get a microwave to my room..Funny request I know. But just made my own oatmeal.”
Caroline Wozniacki explaining on Twitter her hotel service request.
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“I have respect for her, but I hope I will be home.”
Svetlana Kuznetsova about if she wants to be like Kimiko Date Krumm and playing tennis at forty.
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Click here to view ===> TENNIS QUOTES
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: See body of message

ARMANDO MARADONA

Image: toonpool.com

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SOCCER QUOTES

Web site presents the best quotes of the 2010 FIFA World Cup games.
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"LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!"

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"Maradona is a nice guy but he can be a bit pesado [a pain, boring] . And I mean pesado in the nicest possible way."

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•Vicente del Bosque gets just a little tired of Maradona's constant griping.

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Click here to view ===> SOCCER QUOTES

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Source: cbc.ca

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BONUS VIDEO:

Icelandic soccer team presents creative dances to celebrate the scoring of

goals during soccer games.

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Click here to view ===> SOCCER GOAL DANCES

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Source: asylum.com

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Editor's note:

Once NFL divas find out about the soccer goal dancing, they

will make Roger Goodell work overtime in leveling fines

to counteract the new dance shenanigans the divas will dream up!

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I can see some divas giving up game salaries to squeeze in their

dances after a winning touchdown is scored and laughing at

the fine at the same time!

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What a can of worms the soccer goal dancing has opened -

sorry, Roger!!!

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: hockeyplayertips.blogspot.com

Image: digitalbattle.com

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HOCKEY HUMOR

Sports blogger presents his selection of videos of the funniest NHL

commercials of all time.

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"LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!"

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Click here to view ===> FUNNY HOCKEY COMMERCIALS

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: itsaboutthemoney.net

Image: bestweekever.tv

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BASEBALL QUOTES

Web site presents baseball and management quotes by George Steinbrenner (R.I.P.)

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Click here to view ===> QUOTES BY THE BOSS

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