FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: buzzle.com

Sports Quotes

‘In order to excel, you must be completely dedicated to your chosen sport. You must also be prepared to work hard and be willing to accept destructive criticism. Without 100 percent dedication, you won't be able to do this.’ Willie Mays

‘I'll let the racket do the talking.’ John McEnroe

‘Competition is the spice of sports; but if you make spice the whole meal you'll be sick.’ George Leonard

‘The best and fastest way to learn a sport is to watch and imitate a champion.’ Jean Claude Killy

‘When you're a winner you're always happy, but if you're happy as a loser you'll always be a loser.’ Mark Fidrych

‘Whenever you get knocked down in the game of life, immediately get up, get better and get going again.’ Greg Hickman

‘Whether you think you can or whether you think you can't, you're right!’ Henry Ford

‘Why did I want to win? Because I didn't want to lose!’ Max Schmelling

In the end, the game comes down to one thing: man against man. May the best man win.’ Sam Huff

‘My thoughts before a big race are usually pretty simple. I tell myself: Get out of the blocks, run your race, stay relaxed. If you run your race, you'll win... channel your energy. Focus.’ Carl Lewis‘

‘When I go out on the ice, I just think about my skating. I forget it is a competition.’ Katarina Witt

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: network.nationalpost.com

2nd & Short: Of turkeys, catfish and other bizarre baseball trades

Posted: May 26, 2008, 9:00 AM by Sean Fitz-Gerald

The List

One weird trade inspires memories of some others. Last Tuesday, the Golden Baseball League, an eight-team circuit buried deep in the sport’s food chain, registered the following transaction:

“Calgary Vipers: Traded RHP John Odom to the Laredo Broncos of the United League for 10 Prairie Sticks Maple Bats, double-dipped black, 34-inch, C243 style.”Odom, who said he does not “really care,” can take comfort in the fact he is not alone on the list of bizarre baseball trades.

Some of our favourites:

5. On April 25, 1962, the Cleveland Indians sent catcher Harry Chiti to the New York Mets for cash and a player to be named later. That player arrived on June 15 — and it was Chiti.

4. In 1931, Chattanooga Lookouts owner Joe Engel traded shortstop Johnny Jones to Charlotte for a 25-pound turkey, which he reportedly had prepared for the local media, saying Charlotte “came out ahead on that deal — that turkey was tough.”

3. Pitcher Tim Fortugno joined the Milwaukee Brewers’ organization in 1989, when his minor-league team, the Reno Silver Sox, agreed to pull the trigger on a deal for US$2,500 — and 12 dozen baseballs.

2. Before they could pry pitcher Ken Krahenbuhl from the Pacific Suns in 1998, the Greenville Bluesmen had to agree to part with cash, a player and 10 pounds of Mississippi catfish.


1. In a move that alters the meaning of “fantasy baseball,” New York Yankees pitchers Fritz Peterson and Mike Kekich announced, in 1973, that they had traded not only their wives, but their children and pets. “We may have to call off Family Day,” general manager Lee MacPhail said.
==========================

Image (Black and White): nydailynews.com
Image (Color): static.baseballtoaster.com

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: network.nationalpost.com

SPORTS QUOTES

“In case it escaped notice, the 285-mile driving distance between Detroit and Pittsburgh is the shortest commute in a Stanley Cup Final since the NHL introduced its East-West format in 1982. It’s so close, in fact, the cops in Ohio have gone to a neutral-zone speed trap.” — Dwight Perry, in The Seattle Times.

“Sidney Crosby Pretty Excited About His Ability To Grow A Playoff Beard.” — Headline at the satirical Web site sportspickle.com.

“The Yankees, you may have heard, take turns wearing Jason Giambi’s tiger-stripped, gold-lamé thong underwear contraption as a slump-buster. The Yankees are in last place in the AL East and Giambi is still flirting with the Mendoza line, so maybe Giambi’s thong isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. That just proves the old adage, ‘The team that flosses together, losses together.’” — Scott Ostler, of the San Francisco Chronicle.

“Yankees first baseman Jason Giambi, belying his status as baseball’s second-highest-paid player this season, entered the week hitting just .191. In other words, he still puts his thong on one leg at a time.” — Perry, again.

“If you collect game-worn sports memorabilia, this is where you should draw the line.” — Ostler, again.

“The WNBA’s new slogan is ‘Expect Great.’ (Runner-up slogan: ‘Good Seats Still Available.’)” — Syndicated columnist Norman Chad, on women’s basketball.

“NFL owners are opting out of the Collective Bargaining Agreement early. Because CBAs can be convoluted, confusing and boring, let me bring this down a level everybody that can understand. Owners: Oink.” — Jeff Schultz of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution.

“What is that? Is that where they dance with each other?” — San Antonio Spurs coach Gregg Popovich, when asked if he was worried about Game 1 of the Western Conference final conflicting on TV with American Idol.

“I’m going to take them out to the bullpen and count them. I’ve got a lot of time on my hands out there.” — Cincinnati Reds reliever Josh Fogg, after Ken Griffey paid back a US$1,500 debt by delivering 150,000 pennies to the clubhouse.

“One of the first things that came to my mind was, ‘Good thing we brought a second javelin.’ ” — Richard Vance, the coach for Utah state high school javelin champion Anthony Miles, after Miles accidentally sent a javelin through the leg of a wandering photographer.

======================

Image: farm1.static.flickr.com

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: kingscorecard.canadaeast.com

HOT DOG RACING?

Once a ham ...

At a March British soccer match between Blackpool and Burnley teams, greyhound owner Jane Holland was escorting her retired dog Fool's Mile for a presentation when the crowd noise evidently energized the champion racer, who broke away.

"(When) she heard the crowd, she was off," said Holland, and Fool's Mile circled the track four times before being restrained.

Said London's Sunday Telegraph, the dog appeared to be reliving her glory days.

================

Image: whippetview.com

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: inthenews.co.uk

SPORTS QUOTES
- - - - - - - - - -
"I'm an emotional person, things can happen on the pitch very quickly but I didn't mean to disrespect the referee." Ashley Cole ( see photo)apologises to Alan Hutton and referee Mike Riley after his horror tackle on the Tottenham Hotspur defender.
- - - - - - - - - -
"I wouldn't put it down to a lack of desire, concentration or anything like that. I would probably put it down to there being a lot of good bowling against us, but we believe we're better players than that and we should be going out there and scoring hundreds." Paul Collingwood is sure the failure of any England batsman to score a first innings Test century since last June isn't anything to do with them.
- - - - - - - - - -
"Look at Brian's results in recent times - they are just phenomenal." England wonderkid Danny Cipriani either has a very short memory or a unique take on the word phenomenal after Brian Ashton's side lost 15-9 to Scotland.
- - - - - - - - - -
"Goalscoring is an art. It's about being in the right place at the right time and he's got that knack." Harry Redknapp hails Jermain Defoe as a real Picasso of the penalty box.
- - - - - - - - - -
"He's a footballer." David Pleat pauses before delivering his expert analysis of PSV's Ibrahim Afellay in ITV's coverage of Spurs' Uefa Cup defeat to the Eredivisie champions.
- - - - - - - - - -
"It takes 1,000 per cent commitment. For two years I've not had the same hunger." Sweden's heptathlon star Carolina Kluft makes Alan Shearer's infamous "110 per cent" claim look like something a slacker might say.
- - - - - - - - - -
"It just goes to show how hard we have worked since the World Cup, with the effort in training. It is probably the fact that everyone is scared senseless of Shaun Edwards." Winger Shane Williams hints that assistant manager Edwards' fear tactics may have been behind Wales' Six Nations grand slam win.

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: associatedcontent.com

BEN HOGAN QUOTES

"The secret is in the dirt" -Common answer Hogan gave when asked how he played so well.

"All I know is, I've seen Nicklaus watch Hogan practice. I've never seen Hogan watch Nicklaus practice." -Tommy Bolt

"If you can't outplay them, outwork them."

"There's no reason a man can't birdie every hole."

"There's no such thing as a natural golf swing."

"There is no similarity between golf and putting, one is played in the air, and the other on the ground."

"I hate a hook. It nauseates me. I could vomit when I see one. It's like a rattlesnake in your pocket."

"The ultimate judge of your swing is the flight of the ball."

"The more I practice, the luckier I get."

"Ben Hogan is the most merciless of all the modern golfers." -Gene Sarazen

While waiting on the 1st tee, Hogan walked up to the player he'd been paired with the day before. "I'm sorry I didn't speak to you yesterday", he said. "But just so you're not surprised, I won't be saying anything today either."

"About all Ben ever said in a tournament was "Good luck" on the 1st tee, and "You're away" after that." -Sam Snead

=================

Image (Movie DVD above): ecx.images-amazon.com

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: sportingnews.com

Image: abc.net.au

BJORN BORG

10 MOST SURPRISING RETIREMENTS

Justine Henin yesterday joined a rarified group of athletes – those who have abruptly decided to walk away from their games while they were still on top. It’s a tough thing to do, and history tells us that the chances that she’ll come crawling back to the court are very good indeed.

I give her two years tops of sitting around eating waffles and she’ll be yearning for that tournament-a-week WTA grind. Also, Henin’s retirement, though impeccably timed for maximum shockliciousness I grant you, still doesn’t make my Top 10 List of All-Time Surprising Sports Retirements.

Honestly, I’m not sure she’d make the top 20, if I went that deep (could I go that deep? I think I could ...). But I’ll keep it at 10. Here goes – if I leave out any big ones, give me a break, cause I’m doing this in the most unscientific of fashions:

10. Ricky Williams – Ricky smoke weed. Ricky do yoga. Ricky talk swami. Ricky retire.

9. Rocky Marciano – Nobody ever talks about it anymore, but it surprised the crap out of people when the Rock retired. He was, after all, 32 years old, the undefeated heavyweight champ and one of the most popular athletes in the U.S at the time.

8. Barry Sanders – Walking away with the all-time rushing record in your grasp? Like it just ain’t no thing? Oh the cojones on the man.

7. Gene Tunney – This Shakespeare-quoting Jack-Dempsey-conqueror retired at the age of 31 to marry an heiress and embark on the path of alcoholism, curmudgeonhood, and a lifelong friendship with George Bernard Shaw. In other words, living the dream.

6. Bjorn Borg – A real shocker. 26 and the McEnroe rivalry just heating up when Borg puts the racket down. The CW is that he knew that Mac had his number and the jig was up. But men, I tend to think that tennis was just interfering too much with the time that he had available for sex.

5. Sugar Ray Leonard – Of course he came back many times, but that first Ray Leonard retirement was a mind-blower. Cosell on the scene, Hagler, black tie event, everyone thinking he’s going to announce the big fight with Marvelous, and WHAM, he pulls the plug. Hollywood, Sugar Ray.

4. Sandy Koufax – Sandy’s last season – 27-9, 3.28, 317 k’s. Enough said.

3. Jim Brown – Ole Jim was shooting The Dirty Dozen in London cause, you know, Jim could act a little bit. So then Art Modell says, “Jim you get back in time for training camp or I’m fining you.” And Jim ponders that and replies, “huh… I retire.” See, no one tells Jim Brown what to do.

2. Michael Jordan – First he retires. Then comes the minor leaguebaseball circus act. The freaky-deeky-osity of the whole thing was completely off the charts.

1. Magic Johnson – Not only the most shocking retirement, but one of the most shocking sports moments of all time, period.