SPECIAL EDITORIAL NOTE FROM SPORTS_NUT, 2/26/2011
.
Welcome to the retirement edition of Funny Sports Quotes.
.
The Funny Sports Quotes blog was created in 11/2007 after I could see I could become a blogger very easily using Google's 3-step process for creating a blog online.
.
For me, like most, work is not my idea of a fun experience, so I had to choose the topic that I would most enjoy pursuing and that, for me, was finding and posting funny sports quotes for entertaining and, in some cases, educating an audience on facets of sports even the most ardent sports fans may not have been aware of.
.
At the same time, I decided to compile a database of funny sports quotes that sports fans and quote fans could visit for "one-stop" shopping, thereby helping them to avoid the need to search elsewhere for sports quotes.
.
So, from 11/2007 until 2/2011. I have compiled quotes on the Funny Sports Quotes blog and its sister blog, FSQuotes, that is accessible only from the Funny Sports Quotes blog.
.
As of 2/26/2011, I believe I have achieved my objective first set in 11/2007, which signals for me the end of my funny sports quotes database project.
.
Kindly note that I have already made the last post (SI Swimsuit) to the blog, shut off further entries to Comments, and I will shut off the email address sports.quotes@gmail.com on 03/14/2011.
.
Also note that many features previously cited on this page have been removed, so that a bare-bones FSQ remains for your future reference.
.
I do hope that my venture was successful in bringing a smile to your face or a skip to your step, since that was all FSQ was created for, your entertainment and pleasure.
.
In closing, I wish you and yours, Godspeed!
.
=====================

Sunday, May 16, 2010

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: imdb.com


.
PAINTBALL HUMOR \ QUOTES
.
Blackballed: The Bobby Dukes Story
.
Plot of the movie Blackballed: The Bobby Dukes Story:
.
Caught cheating and banned for ten years, Bobby Dukes, paintball's first superstar, returns to reclaim his title and erase the memory of his tainted past.
.
Movie Trailer:
.
Click here to view ===> BLACKBALLED TRAILER
.
Movie Quotes:
.
Bill Henry: You have two days bobby dukes, to get yourself back on the saddle of your formal self. You will not achieve that goal by splashing around in the lower end of your pool of self esteem...
.
Bobby Dukes: [under his breath] What does that mean?
.
............
.
Bill Henry: Oh, Bobby Dukes, please kick their ass so hard that their ass goes up their own ass
.
Click here to view ===> BLACKBALLED QUOTES
.
User review on imdb.com:
.
Hilarious movie, see it first chance you get, 14 June 2005

Author: Jeff Beachnau (beachna9@msu.edu) from Omena, Michigan

I was lucky enough to catch this at the Waterfront Film Festival in Saugatuck, Michigan. I loved it so much, I saw it twice, and I never do that at festivals.

This hilarious film stars Rob Corddry from The Daily Show. The film is about Bobby Dukes, a famous paintball star that was caught "wiping" during the championship match. After ten years, Dukes returns to the game, assembling a new team and hoping to gain back his title.

The mockumentary is well done, though the laughs don't come right away, when they show up they don't leave. The teammates are all hilarious, and the side characters add to the comedy. Though the games are fun to watch, the comedy comes from training for the games. When Bobby gets his team together you can't help but laugh. Each member has their own great qualities, especially Rob Riggle and Paul Scheer. Writing this review, it's been two days since I last saw it, and I still keep laughing at some of the jokes.

I really hope this movie makes it to theatres, I know people will check it out and love it. I saw the director after the film and he said he had a lot of great extra footage shot that he would love to include on the DVD, so I can't wait, I'll buy it first chance I get.

See the movie, spread the word.
.
-------------------------
.
BONUS ALERT FOR SPORTS \ COMEDY FANS:
.
Blackballed: The Bobby Dukes Story can be viewed free online on
hulu.com.
.
To access the movie, log onto hulu.com, find the movie on the
movies menu and watch the 90-minute comedy for free on your PC.
.
=========================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: golfcoursehumor.com


Image: britamtvdvd.com
.
GOLF HUMOR
Web site presents a printout and video of a Beverly Hillbillies golf episode
.
Part I: Beverly Hillbillies opening theme music video
.
Click here to view ===> BEVERLY HILLBILLIES THEME
.
-----------------------
.
Part II: Printout of script highlights and video of entire golf episode.
.
Click here to view ===> BEVERLY HILLBILLIES GOLF EPISODE
,
=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: wikipedia.com

BASKETBALL QUOTES
Web site presents quotes by Abe Lemons., basketball coach
.
"You may be big in New York, but in Walters, Oklahoma, you're nobody."
to broadcaster Howard Cosell
.
"If you had come with me, you could be the principal of a high school by now."
to Johnny Bench, whom he tried to recruit with at Oklahoma City University.
.
"Damn referees. I'll miss them less than anybody."
after losing his final game by one point, in a bid for victory No. 600
.
"Hey, some places this would be a foul!"
while at the scorers' table holding up a tooth that had been dislodged from the mouth of his player, James Washington
.
"That foul wouldn't have killed a gnat."
after losing his final game on a free throw after a disputed foul
.
"How hard is it to coach track? Tell 'em to stay to the left and get back as fast as you can."
after being fired by Texas Athletics Director and former Kansas State track coach DeLoss Dodds
.
"I never substitute just to substitute. I play my regulars. The only way a guy gets off the floor is if he dies."
.
"At Pan American one year the only player coming back was named Tree McCullough. But hell, his name could have been Stumpy."
.
"It was the toughest seven man zone we faced all year."
.
"I'm not playing favorites. All my favorites have graduated."
.
"We ran all over Texas-Arlington last season, 84-83. Ozie and Rich scored 71 points for us. After the game a reporter asked me how I thought we'd have done without them. I said, "Figure it out for yourself. We'da got beat 83-13."
.
" We went to Alaska once and they made us honorary Alaskans. Then we went to Hawaii and they made us honorary Hawaiians. We're going to the Virgin Islands this year."
.
"I was at OCU 23 years and today I can give you the addresses of every kid who played for me, and what he's doing now. To me, that's what coaching is all about."
.
When asked how to stop illegal recruiting Abe said, "Just give every coach the same amount of money and tell them they can keep what’s left over."
.
"It was a hole in one contest and I had a three."
.
=========================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: metro.co.uk

SPORTS QUOTES

'Voice of boxing' Harry Carpenter dies at 84
.
However, the broadcaster himself also had many fine - and not so fine - moments behind the microphone.
.
Boxing bloopers

- 'This boxer is doing what's expected of him, bleeding from the nose'

- 'Magri has to do well against the unknown Mexican, who comes from a famous family of five boxing brothers'

- 'They said it would last two rounds - they were half right, it lasted four'

- 'Marvellous oriental pace he's got, just like a Buddhist statue'

Sporting slip-ups and Wimbledon wobbles

- 'Ah, isn't that nice - the wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew'

- 'We haven't had any more rain since it stopped raining'

- 'It's quite clear Virginia Wade is thriving on the pressure, now the pressure on her to do well is off'
.
=====================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: cyclingtipsblog.com


.
CYCLING HUMOR \ QUOTES
.
Murphy's Laws of Cycling
.
Click here to view ===> MURPHY'S LAWS OF CYCLING
=================