FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: citypages.com

OLYMPICS SPORTS TRIVIA
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[ Includes Track and Field Sports ]
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The 12 Most Bizarre Olympic Games Moments
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For centuries, the Olympics have celebrated the most impressive athletes in sport. From a she-male to a guy who couldn't pee for his urine test, from a guy who pierced his head to a fellow shot while competing (and still won gold!) it's all here.
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12. Horse Beatdown:
1968 Olympics. A pentathlete, West Germany's Hans-Jurgen Todt, became extremely upset with his recalcitrant ride during the equestrian portion. Standard. Then he physically attacked his horse, Ranchero, and had to be pulled away by teammates. Repeat: dude tried to beat down a horse. We didn't know any Germans had seen Blazing Saddles.
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11. Charles Hefferon and Dorando Pietri:
1908 marathon. Hefferon led until the last few kilometers, when he accepted an ill-advised glass of victory champagne from a spectator ... and became ill. He was overtaken by Pietri, who entered the stadium exhausted and dehydrated ... and became ill. Pietri took the wrong path, collapsed, was redirected, and collapsed four more times. Helped to his feet, Pietri won but was later DQ'd for accepting asistance.
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10: Edwin Flack and his Butler:
In the Athens games of 1896, considered the first modern era Olympic Games, Edwin Flack won both the 800 and 1500 meter races. This made him Australia's first Olympic champion. But it was his performance in the marathon that gets him on this list. Flack employed his butler to bicycle alongside him, keeping the Ozzie supplied with refreshments. Sadly, the plan failed -- because the butler, not the runner, collapsed.
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9. Guy gets run over by train, loses leg, dominates Olympics.
American gymnast George Eyser competed in the 1904 Summer Olympics, winning three gold medals and six overall. He competed with a wooden left leg, his original appendage lost to a train accident.
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8. At least he wasn't shot in the Hinds:
During the Paris games of 1924, American sharpshooter Sidney Hinds notched a perfect 50 score for the free-rifle gold. This despite being shot during his round by a Belgian who accidentally dropped his own rifle. Hinds later became an American general, but his war wound came in the Olympics.
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7. "The Dropsy Drown This Fool":
Upon earning his first Olympic gold in rowing, Russian Vyacheslav Ivanov celebrates, leaping up -- and losing his medal into Melbourne's Lake Wendouree. Though he dove into the lake in search of gold, but came up empty.
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6. "A Case of Shy Pee":
Irish boxer Christopher Finnegan won gold in '68, but that was the easy part. Despite being plied with water and four pints of beer, Finnegan couldn't let fly for the required drug test. Officials followed him for hours until nature finally took its course: a golden stream for a gold medal.
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5. Slowest. 5000 Meters. Ever.:
Haitian dictator "Baby Doc" Duvalier sent Dieudonne Lamothe of Haiti to the 1976 Montreal games with one threat: finish the race or be killed. Luckily, he didn't say "don't run the slowest time in Olympic history, 18:50:07," because that's what Lamothe did. Beats execution.
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4. Goatselympics:
For London's turn at hosting the games in 2012, the BBC held an open logo competition. One clever wag submitted one of the Internet's most vulgar and disturbing memes: the Goatse man. It was live on the BBC's site for hours before being pulled down. And if you don't know what we're talking about when we say "Goatse," resist the temptation to use Google. Really.
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3. Fence This:
Russian swordsman Boris Onyschenko was dominant for years, coming into 1976 as a big favorite in fencing. But he was caught using a rigged épée with hidden electronics, meaning he could score points without ever touching his adversary. He was disqualified and fled -- leading many to wonder about those previous six years.
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2. Chinese Pin Torture:
In advance of the upcoming China games, Dr. Wei Sheng pierced his head and face numerous times -- with needles reflecting the Olympic colors. Thankfully, the "Prince Albert" is presumably unknown in China, and the Doc wears pants.
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1. Stella the Fella:
When Stella Walsh was shot and killed in 1980, the world lost a National Track & Field Hall of Fame member and 1932 Olympic gold medal winner. But when “Stella's” body was autopsied, police discovered male genitals. The holder of 20 world records, it turned out, was born Stanislawa Walasiewiczowna in Poland. Studies revealed that “Stella the Fella” had mosaicism, a condition where both male and female chromosomes are present. Irony: when Stella's 100-meter gold medal defense at the 1936 Berlin games ended in a loss to Helen Stephens, a Polish journalist had accused Stephens of being a man.
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: cemc.org

Image: standrewsiowa.com
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GOLF QUOTES
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Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.
~ P. J. O'Rourke
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Golf is a game of expletives not deleted.
~ Dr. Irving A. Gladstone
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You have to make corrections in your game a little bit at a time. It's like taking your medicine. A few aspirin will probably cure what ails you, but the whole bottle might just kill you.
~ Harvey Penick
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I may be the only golfer never to have broken a single putter, if you don't count the one I twisted into a loop and threw into a bush.
~ Thomas Boswell
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If you pick up a golfer and hold it close to your ear, like a conch shell, and listen, you will hear an alibi.
~ Fred Beck
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I say this without reservations whatsoever: It is impossible to outplay an opponent you can't outthink.
~ Lawson Little
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Give me a man with big hands, big feet, and no brains and I will make a golfer out of him!
~ Walter Hagen
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Anyone who criticizes a golf course is like a person invited to a house for dinner who, on leaving, tells the host that the food was lousy.
~ Gary Player
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A golf course is the epitome of all that is purely transitory in the universe, a space not to dwell in, but to get over as quickly as possible!
~ Jean Giraudoux
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Like life, golf can be humbling. However, little good comes from brooding about mistakes we've made. The next shot, in golf or life, is the big one!
~ Grantland Rice
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Baffling late-life discovery: Golfers wear those awful clothes on purpose.
~ Herb Caen
=====================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: hornetjuice.com

Image: coolrunning.com.au
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MARATHON RUNNING QUOTES
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"I have met my hero, and he is me."
George Sheehan
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"To describe the agony of a marathon to someone who's never run it is like trying to explain color to someone who was born blind."
Jerome Drayton
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"Marathon running is a terrible experience: monotonous, heavy, and exhausting."
Veikko Karvonen, 1954 European and Boston Marathon Champ
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"Marathoning is like cutting yourself unexpectedly. You dip into the pain so gradually that the damage is done before you are aware of it. Unfortunately, when awareness comes, it is excruciating."
John Farrington, Australian marathoner
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"There is the truth about the marathon and very few of you have written the truth. Even if I explain to you, you'll never understand it, you're outside of it."
Douglas Wakiihuri speaking to journalists
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"It hurts up to a point and then it doesn't get any worse."
Ann Trason
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"I cannot have survival as my only goal. That would be too boring. My goal is to come back in my best running form. It is good for me to have that goal; it will help me."Ludmila Engquist (Olympic champion hurdler facing cancer and chemotherapy)
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"If you start to feel good during an ultra, dont' worry you will get over it."
Gene Thibeault
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"Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired."
Jules Renard
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"The start of a World Cross Country event is like riding a horse in the middle of a buffalo stampede. It's a thrill if you keep up, but one slip and you're nothing but hoof prints."
Ed Eyestone
=======================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: latimesblogs.latimes.com

SPORTS QUOTES
Quotes about Olympics 2008
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CBS' "Late Show with David Letterman":
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Do you have Olympic fever? Everybody in the Olympics is worried about the air quality in China, a lot of smog.
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I have friends over there who tell me that the air in China looks like the inside of Willie Nelson's tour bus.
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They had a practice today in Beijing for the Olympics. A javelin thrower -– this is the honest to God's truth -– he threw the javelin up into the air and it stuck.
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NBC's "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno":
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Are you all excited about the upcoming Summer Olympics?
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What's that one sport they do, that rhythmic gymnastics with that ribbon thing? Is this really a sport? Didn't that used to be called playing with a cat?
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China says they’re doing everything they can to help clean up air pollution before the Olympics and they're taking this very seriously.
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In fact, they have got every 6-year-old in the country working 24 hours a day.
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In fact, Beijing skies are so polluted that Chinese authorities are planning emergency measures for the Olympics. For example, protesters will now only be run over with hybrid tanks."
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**************EXTRA ADDED BY LETTERMAN:
Source: newsmax.com
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Quotes:
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Everyone in China already has Olympic fever. Or as it’s also known, bronchial asthma.
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The United States bicycle team got off the plane wearing air filter masks. They say the only way they’re going to get fresh air is to suck it out of their tires.
========================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: usatoday.com

Tiananmen Square

Image: blogs.bootsnall.com

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SPORTS HUMOR

Confucius Sayings Updated for Olympics 2008

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Confucius' well-worn lessons stand Olympic test of time

By Mike Lopresti, Gannett News Service

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Before we had Dr. Phil and Dear Abby to guide us, there was ... Confucius.The man had a lot to say, even though he lived 2,500 years before talk radio. He has dispensed more quotes than Dick Vitale.

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And now that the Olympics are about to start in his old neighborhood, it seemed a good time to reflect on some of his adages, and how they relate to the modern Games of Beijing.

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"When anger rises, think of the consequences."
The international basketball referees are going to make some calls that defy description, because they always do. Might as well sit down and relax, Coach Krzyzewski. This ain't Durham.

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"A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step."
Welcome to the back of the security checkpoint line at Tiananmen Square.

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"Study the past if you would define the future."
Remember all the good publicity East Germany and the Soviets used to get with huge medal counts, from the uneven bars to the hammer throw? China does.

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"Do not be desirous of having things done quickly."
Plan on it taking more than an hour to get your luggage at the airport. After all, your bags have to be searched for dangerous weapons, illicit drugs and autographed pictures of the Dalai Lama.

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"Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart."
China will work hard to make these Olympics so grand, they'll even be bigger than Brett Favre reporting to the Packers' camp.

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"Don't complain about the snow on your neighbor's roof when your own doorstep is unclean."
Any Americans who gripe about the transportation in Beijing the next three weeks should remember one word. Atlanta.

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"To be wronged is nothing, unless you continue to remember it."
Everyone keeps talking about how the Beijing air can be dirty enough to choke a yak. China will forget the insults, keep turning off the suburban smokestacks, limit traffic to only drivers born on Feb. 29, and exchange high-fives if the sky turns blue.

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"Sorrow not at being unknown, but seek to be worthy of note."
A gold medal is still a gold medal, even if you compete in the modern pentathlon.

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"Everything has its beauty but not everyone sees it."
Some people look at the National Stadium — the Bird's Nest — and see a masterpiece. Some think it was designed by a couple of architects after an all-night drinking binge.

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"Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves."
Never mind vows of vengeance for 2004. What USA Basketball needs if it doesn't want to lose to Lithuania and Argentina anymore is tougher defense and better shooting.

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"Success has many fathers, failure is an orphan."
Those who go without medals or flunk drug tests do not end up on the cover of Wheaties boxes or get invited to sit next to Jay Leno.

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"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without."
True, there have been some real head cases running sprints in track and field. But nobody slow ever won the 100-meter dash.

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"The superior man is modest in his speech, but exceeds in his actions."
There'll be no trash talking when China wipes up the competition at table tennis.

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"It is better to light one small candle than curse the darkness."
You can complain about the dung beetles and scorpion brochettes at the food stands in Beijing and starve. Or you can go to McDonald's.

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"It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop."
The leader at the six-mile mark doesn't always win the marathon. Unless he's from Africa.

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"When prosperity comes, do not use all of it."
NBC paid nearly $900 million for broadcast rights. China sold nearly seven million tickets, and the T-shirt sales should be higher than the Himalayas. Some of that dough has to end up in Hong Kong banks.

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"He who will not economize will have to agonize."
When the Olympics are over, send that one off to the Yankees.

==========================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: quotegarden.com

President Richard Nixon, Opening Day, 1969

Image: upload.wikimedia.org

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SPORTS QUOTES

Quotes about the Olympics

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Finishing second in the Olympics gets you silver. Finishing second in politics gets you oblivion. ~Richard Nixon

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Performing enhancing drugs are banned in the Olympics. Okay, we can swing with that. But performance debilitating drugs should not be banned. Smoke a joint and win the hundred meters, fair play to you. That's pretty damn good. Unless someone's dangling a Mars bar off in the distance. ~Eddie Izzard

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Here's a good trick: Get a job as a judge at the Olympics. Then, if some guy sets a world record, pretend that you didn't see it and go, "Okay, is everybody ready to start now?" ~Jack Handey

=====================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: community.compuserve.com

US swimmer Kathryn Hoff

Image: daylife.com

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SPORTS HUMOR

Humor about the Olympics 2008

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The Top 14 Signs You're Becoming Obsessed with the Olympics

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14> You still won't use a coaster, but now you put down your wet beer glass five times in the rings pattern.

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13> Casual Friday last week? Jeans and a Polo shirt. Casual Friday this week? REALLY low-rise swim pants and a strategic waxing.

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12> You imagine your Michael Phelps poster is hitting on your Holly McPeak poster.

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11> You've confiscated all the ball caps on your son's Little League team and replaced them with olive wreath crowns.

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10> You've been wearing your hair in a face-stretching ponytail with little pink clip barrettes all through the gymnastics competitions -- and the other guys on the oil rig are starting to get uncomfortable with that.

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9> On your wedding night, you gave your new bride a one-tenth point deduction for not sticking to the landing.

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8> Getting into a fight down at the beer joint is nothing new for you, but this time the argument was about badminton.

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7> You've bought and integrated so many TiVos that merely by pressing Rewind you can actually travel back in time.

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6> "Dangit, Larry -- you couldn't tell a foil from a saber if you sat on 'em. Twenty bucks says my France kicks your skinny German butt in team epee!"

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5> You now have five interlocked rings dangling from your nipples.

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4> You filled your cubicle with sand and started referring to the department as "Beach QA."

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3> These days you only hire very petite hookers, and you insist that they wear spandex, talk like chipmunks and have chalk powder all over their hands.

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2> You now insist everyone call you "The Fredpedo."

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and Topfive.com's Number 1 Sign You're Becoming Obsessed With the Olympics...
1> You begin singing "The Star-Spangled Banner" if you finish peeing before the guy at the next urinal.

============================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: timesonline.co.uk

Jan-Ove Waldner

Image: timesonline.co.uk

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SPORTS QUOTES

Olympics Trivia

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[ Includes Track and Field Sports ]

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Top 50 greatest Olympic Games moments

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Matthew Syed, a former international table tennis player who represented Great Britain in two Olympic Games, chooses his most memorable moments:

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I have interpreted my brief widely in attempting to come up with the 50 most memorable moments in Olympic history. There is inevitably a personal, and therefore, British dimension to the list, but I have endeavoured to be as objective as possible. It is not just a list of the most stirring and rousing moments – or the most brilliant – but also includes instances that have broken into our consciousness for other reasons, whether tragic, comic or epic. Doubtless Beijing will burn many more images on our collective retina, but in the meantime, here is my list of the greatest moments of the last 112 years. Click on the links to read the original Times reports.

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------------------------------------------------

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50. Barcelona 1992.

Jan-Ove Waldner won gold in the men’s table tennis in one of the most riveting displays of virtuosity in the history of the sport. It would have made it into the top ten had I not feared allegations of bias.

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49. London 1908.

Wyndham Halswell from Scotland won the 400 metres as the sole runner. In the "proper" final two days earlier it was deemed that two Americans had conspired to block him from passing. Officials declared the race void and ordered a re-run, but all the other competitors refused to race against him.

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48. Mexico 1968.

Britain's hearts were dashed as favourite Lillian Board, who was tipped to win the 400m, saw Colette Besson of France come past her with five metres to go. It became a precious memory as Board died tragically of cancer at 22.

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47. Montreal 1976.

Russian fencer Boris Onischenko was disqualified after using a circuit breaker to score points in the epee without touching his opponent. Some suggest he had been using the technology for six years.

46. St Louis 1904.

US gymnast George Eyser won two golds, a silver and a bronze with a wooden leg.

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45. Rome 1960.

Wilma Rudolph won three gold medals in 1960 - the 100m, 200m and relay. Remarkable considering she had polio as a child and only learned to walk normally at the age of 7.

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44. Rome 1960.

Sisters Tamara and Irina Press won five golds and one silver in Rome in 1960. They also set 26 world records in shot put, discus and pentathlon - but mysteriously disappeared from international competition when genetic testing was instituted.

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43. Berlin 1936.

Born in Poland in 1911, Stanislawa Walasiewica went to America with her family at the age of 2 and changed her name to Stella Walsh. She chose to run for Poland as she worked for the Polish consulate in New York. She won the women's 100m in a world record time of 11.9s in 1936. In 1980 she was caught in the crossfire of a botched robbery; the autopsy revealed she had ambiguous genitalia and could not easily be identified as either biologically male or female.

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42. London 1908.

Italian waiter Dorando Pietri became one of the world's most famous marathon runners after collapsing five times in the stadium before being helped over the final few yards to win - but the result was disqualified. Later, he was awarded a special gold cup by Queen Alexandra as consolation.

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41. Barcelona 1992.

Paralympic archer Antonio Rebollo spectacularly lit the Olympic flame by firing a burning arrow towards the cauldron in an unforgettable coup de theatre. He later complained to a Spanish newspaper that he had been shabbily treated and had received no official accreditation or tickets to see any of the events, not even the archery.

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40. Rome 1960.

Ethiopian Abebe Bikila became the first runner representing an African nation to win a gold in the marathon at the Games, something he did barefoot. It was only the third time he had run the distance and he set a world record in the process. He repeated the performance in Tokyo four years later.

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39. Sydney 2000.

Eric "The Eel" Moussambani from Equatorial Guinea set the slowest time ever for the 100m freestyle. At one stage it looked like Moussambani, who had only learned to swim in January that year - was drowning not swimming but the crowds roared him home in 1 minute 52 seconds. We like losers - but only if they are spectacular losers.

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38. Barcelona 1992.

With restrictions on professionals lifted, the US sent their dream basketball team, which blew away all opposition.

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37. Los Angeles 1932.

American Mildred "Babe" Didrikson - still believed by some to be the world's greatest sportswoman - won six of eight events in the pre-Olympic trials and set three world records. In the Olympics she was only allowed to compete in three events, winning two golds (javelin and hurdles) and a silver in the high jump because it was decided that she had an illegal style. Later she became a golfer, winning many big titles.

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36. Tokyo 1960.

Ann Packer won the 800m final at the Tokyo Olympics to the strains of an impassioned David Coleman in the commentary box. Women had come a long way from the Amsterdam Olympics of 1928 when six of the nine runners in the 800m collapsed and two were stretchered off. The event was deemed unsuitable for women and banned until 1960.

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35. Mexico 1968. Dick Fosbury changed the high jump forever with his revolutionary flop. He won gold - and many of us schoolboys who tried to emulate him ended up with bruised backs.

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34. Athens 1896.

Greeks had expected to win lots of medals but none came until the marathon (which back then was conducted over 40km). Of the 17 runners, 14 of them were Greek. Part time water seller and shepherd, Spyridon Louis, overtook a Frenchman and an Australian to win and was accompanied over the line by Princes Constantine and George who subsequently gave him a farm. Legend says that he stopped at a restaurant half way through the race to down an alcoholic beverage and told everyone he would win.

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33. Athens 2004.

Michael Phelps took six gold medals, just one short of Mark Spitz, with a majestic performance.

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32. Montreal 1976.

14-year-old gymnast Nadia Comaneci scored perfect "10s" in the uneven bars, the balance beam and the all round competition. Some scoreboards were not equipped and recorded her marks as "1.00."

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31. Los Angeles 1984.

Daley Thompson had already won the decathlon four years earlier in Moscow where he broke the world record. His huge rival in 1984 was Jurgen Hingsen, who had twice beaten Thompson's world record and was the current holder with 8,798 points. But Thompson stood triumphant after a supreme all-round performance. He won with a score of 8,797 with Hingsen on 8,673.

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30. Athens 2004.

Kelly Holmes's gob-smacked face after winning gold in the 800m is one of the most enduring images of the last Games. After threatening to do something special for 10-12 years and plagued by injuries, at the age of 34 she did what nobody believed possible by also going on to win the 1,500m at the same Games. .
29. Atlanta 1996.

The Games were marred by a bombing at the Centennial Olympic Park which killed two and injured 111 others. Eric Robert Rudolph is currently serving a life sentence in Florence, Colorado.

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28. Sydney 2000.

Steve Redgrave's win in the men's coxless four made it five gold’s at five consecutive Olympics over 20 years – the only Briton to achieve this feat. But Redgrave cannot, on statistical grounds, claim to be the most enduring Olympian: Birgit Fischer (a German kayaker) won eight gold medals over six Olympic Games.

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27. Montreal 1976.

Alberto Juantarina of Cuba, nicknamed "White Lightning", became the only man to win gold in both the 400m and 800m. He later served as Vice Minister of Sports for Cuba.

26. Moscow 1980.

"Yifter the Shifter" was so named because of his abrupt, exceptional change in speed while executing his kick to win the 5,000m and 10,000m (he ran the last 200m of 5,000m in 27.2 seconds and 26.8 seconds in 1,0000m). He refused to be drawn on his age - reported to be anything between 33 and 42 - telling the world: "Men may steal my chickens. Men may steal my sheep. But no man can steal my age."

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25. Stockholm 1912.

Jim Thorpe – part native American and considered the greatest all round athlete in first half of the 20th century - was awarded gold for the decathlon and pentathlon by the King of Sweden who told him "you are the greatest athlete in the world," to which Thorpe replied "thanks king". He was later forced to return his medals due to playing baseball in a minor professional league match. He tried for years to be reinstated but Olympic president Avery Brundage (whom Thorpe had easily beaten in Stockholm) refused to give way. However, 71 years later and 30 years after Thorpe's death in 1982, the IOC lifted its ban and returned Thorpe's name to the record books and the replica medals were given to his family.

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24. Mexico 1968.

Nothing prepared the nation for David Hemery's astonishing world record run in the 400m hurdles. He had been studying at Boston University, analysing US rivals and racing them whenever possible. He knew he was in his best ever form but did not show himself in any of the heats. He decimated the field.
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23. Los Angeles 1984.

In the 3,000m final, the favourite, Mary Decker, of America, set off at a fast pace with the barefooted South African Zola Budd, Britain's Wendy Sly and Romania's Maricica Puica in a tight group behind. At 1,600m Budd took the lead but off the bend she collided with Decker who was trying to come up on the inside, sending Decker sprawling onto the field and out of the race. Decker was helped off the track in tears and Budd finished seventh. Fevered debate centred on whether the controversial Budd had broken the rules by cutting inside without establishing a clear lead.

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22. London 1948.

World War II interrupted Fanny Blankers-Koen’s career, but she came back as a 30-year-old mother to win four gold medals in 1948.

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21. Rome 1960.

Cassius Clay won gold in the light heavyweight class and was so made up he wore the medal for two days. But he later threw it into the Ohio River after being refused service at a white's only restaurant. At the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta he was awarded a replacement by the US basketball team.

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20. Munich 1972.

Russian gymnast Olga Korbut captured the public's imagination with her acrobatic floor exercises and spectacular beam routines. She won three golds and a silver, smiling and dancing her way into the hearts of the world, in the process subverting the stereotype of the East European automaton.

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19. London 1952.

Emil Zatopek took over from Paavo Nurmi as the king of distance running, winning the marathon just days after triumphing in the 5,000m and 10,000m. It is hard to see his feat being equalled.

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18. Barcelona 1992.

Britain's Derek Redmond tore his right hamstring in the semi-final of the 400m and fell to the ground. When he saw the stretcher-bearers running towards him he began to hobble on one leg down his lane, at which point his father elbowed past officials to assist him to the finishing line. It won a rousing ovation from the 65,000 crowd. The poignancy was heightened by the fact that Redmond's career had been frustrated by injury - he was forced to withdraw from the 1988 games and by 1992 he had undergone five operations, including one on his Achilles tendon less than four months previously.

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17. Munich 1972.

The US basketball team had been unbeaten in 63 Olympic matches going into the final with Russia at the height of the Cold War. With three seconds remaining, Russia led 49-48 when a foul was awarded to the US. The first two shots were nailed, but a horn was blown during the second shot. The third shot failed and the Americans started to celebrate their win, 50-49. But then an official said he had whistled for play to stop after hearing the earlier horn and the Russians said that they had requested a timeout before the shots were attempted. The referee ordered the clock to be reset to 3 seconds to replay the inbound. Russia failed to score. But then officials said that the clock was still in the process of being reset when the referee put the ball in play. The Secretary General of FIBA (International Basketball Federation) stepped in and ordered the clock to be reset to 3 seconds and the inbound replayed. The Russians scored and were crowned champions. The Americans refused, unsurprisingly, to turn up to the medal ceremony. The silver medals still sit unclaimed in a vault of IOC headquarters and some members of the American team have it written into their wills that no member of their families may claim the medals after their death.

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16. Seoul 1988.

The world winced when Greg Louganis, the US diver, hit his head on the board on his ninth preliminary springboard dive, while attempting a 2½ somersault pike. He received temporary stitches before completing his tenth dive which gained him the highest score in the preliminaries. The next day he won gold. Later, in 1995, it was revealed that Louganis had been HIV positive at the time of the accident and had not informed the doctor treating him. The doctor subsequently tested negative for HIV.

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15. Athens 2004.

In one of the most stunning meltdowns in sporting history, Paula Radcliffe collapsed in the marathon four miles from home. She had missed out on medals in the previous Olympics in Sydney and looked in fine form coming into the race, albeit under a huge burden of expectation, much of it self-imposed. It was the hottest day of the month and the humidity was at its highest for six weeks. Debate continues as to whether she was beaten by conditions or gave up at not being able to make up ground on Japan's Mizuki Noguchi who had pulled away from her at the 16-mile stage. Noguchi went on to win and attributed it to drinking the stomach juices of giant killer hornets which she says gave her performance an extra buzz.

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14. Sydney 2000.

Cathy Freeman, the first aboriginal athlete to compete for Australia, won gold in the 400m and ignited a nation. Up to then it had been a disappointing home Olympics for the Australians, especially in the pool, and Freeman represented a last chance of glory. She ran her victory lap carrying both Aborigine and Australian flags.

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13. Atlanta 1996.

Quivering under the affliction of Parkinson's disease, Muhammad Ali lit the torch at the opening ceremony of the 1996 Olympic Games: it was a moment of almost unbearable poignancy.

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12. Atlanta 1996.

Michael Johnson became the first man to win both the 200m and 400m, but it was his stunning performance in the former event that shocked spectators. The time of 19.32s took a chunk out of the existing world record. It seemed even more apt that Johnson's unusual style - all legs and straight back - evoked memories of Jesse Owens.

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11. Munich 1972.

Mark Spitz, the United States swimmer with the big moustache, promised before the games that he would win seven golds. He did not disappoint, taking seven world records into the bargain.

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10. Los Angeles 1984.

Carl Lewis matched Jesse Owens by winning four golds, in the 100m, 200m, long jump and sprint relay. A stunning performance by one of the most successful Olympians, it was clouded only when allegations emerged that Lewis may have tested positive for banned substances before the 1988 Olympics along with other members of the American team.

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9. Paris 1924.

Another epic British rivalry pitted Harold Abrahams (a Jew) against Eric Liddell (a Christian), a confrontation chronicled in the wonderful film Chariots of Fire. Liddell was selected for the 100m, 200m and 400m but with the 100m heat scheduled for a Sunday he declined to race and instead preached a sermon in a Scottish church in the French capital. He went on to win bronze in the 200m and gold in the 400m. Liddell later became a missionary in China and died in a Japanese internment camp in February 1945. Abrahams won the 100m - the first European to do so for 36 years - and went on to become a prominent official in sport and an admired BBC commentator.

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8. Moscow 1980.

Sebastian Coe gained sweet revenge in the 1,500m for what happened in the 800m (see No 7). Jurgen Straub of East Germany pulled away off the final bend, but Coe moved through the gears and eased away to win, with Steve Ovett finishing third. Coe collapsed on the track in tears and pulled away from Ovett's outstretched hand of congratulations to run a victory lap. He won the 1,500m again four years later but failed once more in the 800m, losing to Brazil's Joaquim Cruz.

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7. Moscow 1980.

Steve Ovett and Sebastian Coe formed one of sport’s most captivating rivalries. Ovett, talented and taciturn, was the underdog in the 800m. Coe, the silky smooth world record holder, was favoured by most of his countrymen. In the event Coe made a series of tactical blunders and was too far adrift when Ovett kicked for home. It took an extraordinary effort for Coe to take silver.

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6. Paris 1924.

Paavo Nurmi is amongst the most remarkable of all Olympians and his performance in 1924 continues to defy belief. The Finn not only won gold in the 1,500m but went on to triumph in the 5,000m with less than 90 minutes between events. He also set new world records in both races. Nurmi also competed in 1920 and 1928.

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5. Mexico 1968.

There have been protests in the Olympics ever since Ralph Rose, the US flag bearer, refused to lower the flag in the 1908 Games held in London due to English occupation of Ireland. But when Tommie Smith and John Carlos raised their gloved fists and bowed their heads during the medal ceremony in protest against racism in US, the images stuck. The protest met with outrage and both men were suspended from the national team and banned from the Olympic village. But it was a milestone in America's civil rights movement and both athletes were honoured in 1998 on the 30th anniversary of their protest.

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4. Munich 1972.

One day in September, eight Palestinian terrorists broke into Israeli athletes' dormitories in the Olympic village. Two were killed instantly and nine taken hostage. Later they were allowed to go to the airport where nine hostages, five terrorists and a policeman died during a bungled rescue attempt. It marked the moment when the Olympics became a target for international terrorism and set the stage for the Games of today, patrolled by armed guards and encircled by all the apparatus of the police state.

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3. Mexico 1968.

On the eve of his defence of his long jump title, Lynn Davies from Wales said: “it only needs Bob Beamon to hit the board right once and we can all go home." In the event Beamon nearly failed to qualify for the final after two no jumps: he had to reduce his run up speed in his third attempt to make the qualifying distance. But in the final he launched into orbit, hanging in thin air for what seemed like an eternity, thus setting a new world record that would stand for 23 years. As a side note, it is worth remembering that, a few months before the Games, Beamon was suspended from his university team for refusing to compete against a college with “racist policies”.

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2. Berlin 1936.

African American Jesse Owens won four Olympic gold medals in the Games staged in the German capital as Hitler intensified his preparations for war. Many have claimed that Owens’s success debunked Nazi claims of Aryan superiority but the truth is rather more complex. Nazi intellectuals responded to the setback with the assertion that because black people have abnormally large “animal” heel bones, the Americans had cheated by selecting a black man. Owens himself later noted that his victory did little to advance the cause of African Americans in the US. The legend that Hitler refused to shake his hand is fiction. He had actually been told by the IOC President that it was not the convention.

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1. Seoul 1988.

Vivid and unforgettable, Ben Johnson astounded the world when he stormed to gold in the 100m in Seoul, leaving Carl Lewis and the laws of aerodynamics in his wake. Johnson shattered the world record with a time of 9.79 seconds and would have gone ever faster had he not commenced his finger-aloft celebration five yards from the line. Two days later he tested positive for steroids. I leave it to Simon Barnes to capture the moral and human ambiguity encapsulated in that extraordinary performance: “There is a part of us that still revels in the fastest men, in these superhuman champions, in these figures of blinding speed and overreaching ambition. We don’t approve of drugs, we don’t approve of cheating, but all the same, we respond to the speed, the ambition, the absolute earth-shattering glory of being the fastest man in the world.”

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: wmtw.com

LISA LESLIE

Image: wmtw.com
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SPORTS QUOTES
Quotes about the 2008 Olympics
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Athletes Juggle Motherhood, Olympics
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Olympic Mothers Strike Balance Of Sports, Family
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Being an athlete and training for the Olympics can be challenging enough.
Now, try doing it while juggling the tasks of training with those of being a mom. .
Striking that balance between sport and motherhood is a reality for 17 American women competing at the 2008 Olympics.
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Judo competitor Valerie Gotay said that her plan, after becoming a mother in 1997, was to come back for one year in 2004. Her success, however, propelled her to continue to seriously train and compete.

Gotay said she converted much of her home into a training facility to better help her juggle motherhood and competition.
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Gotay also said she home schools her children so that they have more time to spend together.
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Softball pitcher Jennie Finch and her husband, Minnesota Twins' minor league pitcher Casey Daigle, may have their son's future already mapped out. As the child of two professional pitchers, Ace Shane, 2, could be set to take the mound at a young age.
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Finch said the hardest part for her is traveling without her young son in tow. That's why she said she tries to take him with her as often as possible.
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"I've been so blessed with being able to travel with him. He's got his little passport. He's quite the world traveler," Finch told ESPN's Page 2. "He's been on over 100 flights already. He's so good on airplanes."
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Olympic swimmer Dara Torres, 41, has gained a lot of attention for being the first American swimmer to make five Olympic teams.
Torres said having her daughter, Tessa, didn't stop her need to train or compete.

"Tessa was put on my chest just after she was born, and I was saying, 'Oh, she's so beautiful,'" Torres told Women's Health magazine. "Then the doctor came in, and the first thing I asked was, 'When can I work out?' He thought I was kidding. He told me I could do aerobic exercise in 6 weeks. I said, 'I have a swim meet in 3 weeks.'"
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For weightlifter Melanie Roach, Olympian is just one of the many titles she holds. As the mother of three children, as well as the wife of a Washington state congressman, Roach also finds time to run her own business, Roach Gymnastics, Inc.
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Three-time Olympic gold medal winner and perennial WNBA All-Star Lisa Leslie said she is ready to compete in her fourth and final Olympic Games.
"This will be my last Olympics -- that's official," Leslie said in a 2008 interview with the Los Angeles Times.
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Leslie and her husband married in November 2005. She gave birth to the couple's first child, Lauren Jolie Lockwood, on June 15, 2007.
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Leslie did not play in the 2007 WNBA season after taking maternity leave to care for Lauren.
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Four American track and field athletes are mothers, which is the most from a single Olympic sport.

Marathon runner Magdalena Lewy Boulet, high jumper Chaunte Howard, discus thrower Aretha Thurmond and hurdler Tiffany Ross-Williams each have one child, and race walker Joanne Dow has two children -- Hannah, 18, and Tim, 16.
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Of the 21 children with current Olympic mothers, 16 are under the age of 6. The oldest child of a current American Olympian mother is Kenneth (K.C.) Shinn, 21, whose mother is shooter Brenda Shinn.
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Shinn, 46, will be competing in her first Olympics.
When she is not competing in shooting contests, Shinn is a lieutenant with the Riverside County Sheriff's Department at the Jurupa Valley Patrol Station in California.
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