FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: rediff.com

OLYMPICS SWIMMING QUOTES

Quotes by and about Michael Phelps

.

QUOTES ABOUT "THE BALTIMORE BULLET"!

Click here to view ===> BULLET

=========================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: hockeygoalies.org

MARTIN BIRON, GOALIE

Image: daylife.com

.

HOCKEY QUOTES

Quotes by hockey goalies, 1970's - 1990's

.

Click here to view ====> GOALIE

=========================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: baseball-fever.com

Image: tigresstracker.com
.
BASEBALL QUOTES
Quotes by Ozzie Guillen
.
"He's a garbage. He's always been a garbage. And he will die a garbage."
Ozzie on Chicago Sun-Times columnist Jay Mariotti, June 21, 2006
.
Ozzie responding on whether his kids were involved during the Sox/Cubs brawl:
"If my kids were on the field, [they were] going to get [their rear end] kicked," Guillen said. "What's Ozzie [Jr.] going to do? Eat somebody. My other one is 20 pounds and the other one is only 14.
"One is a baby, one is too little, another one, the only thing he can do is eat somebody or drink somebody," Guillen added with a laugh.
.
Ozzie on what would happen if Jerry Reinsdorf told him to shave his goatee;
"Get another manager, I can't. I want to look old. The last time I shaved my goatee off, people thought it was my fault we played bad."
.
Ozzie on spring Training as skipper of a world Championship club as opposed to being a rookie boss in 2004;"Now, there are just 30 or 40 reporters around to see how big my mouth really is."
.
Ozzie on the team's 4-4 tie against the Cubs in Mesa this afternoon;"It's the best game we played all spring."
.
When he was being sworn in as a US citizen in January,Ozzie was asked on his test who the Mayor of Chicago was,Ozzie replied,
"I said Ozzie Guillen."
.
Here's Ozzie on Cubs' pitcher Rich Hill after Hill took verbal shots at AJ Pierzynski on Saturday before Hill was sent down to AAA Iowa.
"Who is Hill? That piece of [bleep] who pitched? Michael [Barrett] realized he was wrong [in punching Pierzynski]. Michael realized he overreacted.
"But that little [bleep] Hill, he should be in Triple-A. He is going to make Dusty Baker get fired. Shut up, you just got here in the big leagues. When you make a comment like that, it was a cheap shot. You don't know the game.''
=======================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: en.proverbia.net

Image: teverekitchen.com
.
SPORTS QUOTES
.
You must not fight too often with one enemy, or you will teach him all your tricks of war.
- Napoleon I (1769-1821) Napoleon Bonaparte. French general.
.
We want to be first; not first if, not first but; but first!
- John F. Kennedy (1917-1963) Thirty-fifth President of the USA
.
A horse never runs so fast as when he has other horses to catch up and outpace
- Ovid (BC 43-AD 18) Roman poet.
.
After the game the King and pawn go into the same box.
- Italian proverb
.
My hat's in the ring. The fight is on and I'm stripped to the buff.
- Theodore Roosevelt (1858-1919) 26th president of the U.S.
=======================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: motivational-depot.com

Image: visitraleigh.com
.
SPORTS QUOTES
.
A well-run restaurant is like a winning baseball team. It makes the most of every crew member's talent and takes advantage of every split-second opportunity to speed up service.
-David Ogilvy 1911-, American Businessman, Advertising Expert
.
You're probably not a member of a major league baseball team, your errors, unless they are truly spectacular, don't show up in the morning paper.
-Jane Goodsell
.
Studio executives are intelligent, brutally overworked men and women who share one thing in common with baseball managers: they wake up every morning of the world with the knowledge that sooner or later they're going to get fired.
-William Goldman 1931-, American Author
.
Business is a combination of war and sport.
-Andre Maurois 1885-1967, French Writer
.
Cards are war, in disguise of a sport.
-Charles Lamb 1775-1834, British Essayist, Critic
.
For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbors, and laugh at them in our turn?
-Jane Austen 1775-1817, British Novelist
.
It is not heroin or cocaine that makes one an addict, it is the need to escape from a harsh reality. There are more television addicts, more baseball and football addicts, more movie addicts, and certainly more alcohol addicts in this country than there are narcotics addicts.
-Shirley Chisholm 1924-, American Social activist
=======================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: blog.sportscolumn.com

NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE QUOTES
Quotes about Emmitt Smith
.
If you love language-butchering and verbal buffoonery then this is going to be tough for you to take. Emmitt Smith has been released by ESPN, kinda.
.
It's official. Emmitt Smith will not be part of ESPN's two-hour pregame show, NFL Countdown, in 2008. ESPN is expected to make the formal announcement soon.
.
Emmitt will be replaced by Cris Carter, whose enhanced visibility could help his chances of getting into the Hall of Fame on the second try. (Then again, if Carter does a bad job or comes off as a blowhard, it could hurt him.)
.
Emmitt will remain on Monday Night Countdown, and he'll have a role on the Sunday morning pre-Countdown version of SportsCenter.
.
We know, we know; it's difficult to confront. We loved listening to Emmitt slaughter the simplest of sentences just like everyone else. Don't forget though, he's not gone; he's just on two hours less each week.
======================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: prorev.com

Image: antekprizering.com
.
SPORTS QUOTES
.
Sonny Liston has a lot of good points. It's his bad points that aren't so good
- Sonny Liston's manager
.
Let there be joy in baseball again, like in the days when Babe Ruth chased an enemy sportswriter down the streets of Boston and ended up getting drunk with him on the waterfront and came back the next day munching on hotdogs and boomed homeruns to the glory of God.
- Jack Kerouac
.
Baseball is the ideal forum for teachiing the art of failure; the very best fail to get a hit seven out of ten times.
- Sam Dunn
.
Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.
- Chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower
.
I have never willingly chased a ball
- Robert Morley
.
Dimaggio, Joe
Although he learned Italian first, Joe, now 24, speaks English without an accent, and is otherwise well adapted to most U.S. mores. Instead of olive oil or smelly bear grease he keeps his hair slick with water. He never reeks of garlic and prefers chicken chow mein to spaghetti.
- Life Magazine, 1939
.
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown, too?
- Stephen Wright
.
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
- Stephen Wright
.
I feel sorry for someone who has to win at everything
- Snoopy
=======================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: prorev.com

CRICKET QUOTE \ HUMOR
.
Cricket
.
You have two sides, one out in the field and one in.
.
Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out.
.
When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out.
.
Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in.
.
There are two men called umpires who stay all out the time and they decide when the men who are in are out.
.
When both sides have been in and all the men have been given out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!
.
- Washington Cricket League

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: prorev.com

Image: dugnorth.com
.
BASEBALL QUOTE
.
Baseball
.
Baseball is different from other games.
Its strength is inherent, metaphysical. Why?
.
First, because the game has a singular and distinctive relationship to time.
Only baseball, among all games, can be called a "pastime."
For baseball is above or outside time.
.
Football, basketball, hockey, soccer games are arbitrarily divided into measured quarters, halves, or periods.
They are controlled, even dominated by time.
.
Not so baseball, which either ignores time or dominates it.
An inning theoretically can go on forever.
.
The same is true of the game.
Interruptions are generally limited to acts of God, such as darkness or rain, or to cultural, religious and quasi-natural occurrences such as curfew or midnight. . .
.
Baseball is also played in a unique spatial frame.
Other games are restricted to limited, defined areas, rectangular or near rectangular, floors or rinks.
.
Not so baseball.
Baseball is played within the lines of a projection from home plate, starting from the point of a 90 degrees and extending to infinity.
.
Were it not for the intervention of fences, buildings, mountains, and other obstacles in space, a baseball traveling within the ultimate projection of the first and third baselines could be fair and fully and infinitely in play.
.
Baseballs never absolutely go out of bounds.
They are either fair or foul; and even foul balls are, within limits, playable and part of the game.
.
Baseball is distinguished from other games, too in the way in which it is controlled by umpires. An umpire is very different from a referee, a field judge, or a linesman.
.
One occasionally hears the cry "fire the referee" but seldom the cry "kill the referee."
That cry is reserved for umpires.
.
Umpires have to be dealt with absolutely, for their power is absolute.
Referees are men called or appointed.
.
Umpires, by contrast, seem to exist in their own right and exercise undelegated power which is not to be reviewed and from which there is no appeal.
.
- Eugene McCarthy, Forward to Lawrence Frank's "Playing Hardball: The Dynamics of Baseball Folk Speech (1984)
======================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: israelbaseballleague.com

Image: amazon.com
.
BASEBALL HUMOR
Quotes from Biblical references
.
BASEBALL IN THE TIMES OF OUR FOREFATHERS
Compiled by Hyman S. Baras
.
-----------------------------------------
.
While baseball is generally considered a “modern” sport, there are references in the Bible that could lead one to deduce that, in fact, baseball dates back thousands of years. Along the same line of thinking as The Da Vinci Code, note the pattern of the following passages, which clearly illustrate that there were Giants in those days as well.
.
For proof of the author's claim, click here ===> BASEBALL