FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: thebaseballpage.com

BASEBALL QUOTES

Stan Musial

In Stan Musial's first four full major league seasons, the Cardinals captured four pennants and three World Championships. Although the Cardinals failed to win another title during his career, Musial went on to become on of the game's greatest players. He won seven batting championships, three MVP Awards, and reached the 3,000 hit milestone. Vin Scully said of him: "He was good enough to take your breath away."

Quotes About Musial
"He could have hit .300 with a fountain pen." - Joe Garagiola

"How good was Stan Musial? He was good enough to take your breath away." - Vin Scully

"I've had pretty good success with Stan by throwing him my best pitch and backing up third." - Carl Erskine

"Once Musial timed your fastball, your infielders were in jeopardy." - Warren Spahn

"A couple years ago they told me I was too young to be president and you were too old to be playing baseball. But we fooled them." - President John F. Kennedy to Musial, at the 1962 All Star Game

Quotes From Musial
"There was never a day when I was as good as Joe DiMaggio at his best. Joe was the best, the very best I ever saw." â€" Stan Musial

"I consciously memorized the speed at which every pitcher in the league threw his fastball, curve, and slider; then, I'd pick up the speed of the ball in the first thirty feet of its flight and knew how it would move once it had crossed the plate." â€" Stan Musial

"I have a darn good job, but please don't ask me what I do." â€" Stan Musial

"I love to play this game of baseball - I love putting on this uniform." â€" Stan Musial

"I never realized that batting a little ball around could cause so much commotion. I now know how Lindbergh must have felt when he returned from St. Louis."

"The first principle of contract negotiations is don't remind them of what you did in the past - tell them what you're going to do in the future."

"The key to hitting for high average is to relax, concentrate, and don't hit the fly ball to center field."

"There is no one correct way to bat, and so of course there is no one correct stance for it."

"When a pitcher's throwing a spitball, don't worry and don't complain, just hit the dry side like I do."

"You wait for a strike, then you knock the shit out of it."

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: canongate.com

13 Olympic Medallists Who Acted in Movies

[ Includes Track and Field Sports ]

1. JOHNNY WEISSMULLER (4 golds; 1924 and 1928 swimming)

While swimming at a club on Sunset Boulevard in Hollywood, Weissmuller was invited to try out for the part of Tarzan. In 1932 he made his film debut in Tarzan, the Ape Man. He eventually starred in 11 more Tarzan films.

2. HERMAN BRIX (silver; 1928 shot put)

Brix changed his name to Bruce Bennett, and pursued a successful 358 career that included performances in Mildred Pierce (1945) and The Treasure of Sierra Madre (1948). He also acted in such clunkers as The Alligator People (1959) and The Fiend of Dope Island (1961).

3. BUSTER CRABBE (gold; 1932 400-metre freestyle)

Crabbe won his gold medal by one-tenth of a second. He later recalled that that tenth of a second led Hollywood producers to discover 'latent histrionic abilities in me'. In 1933 Crabbe made his film debut as Karpa the Lion Man, in King of the Jungle. He eventually appeared in 53 movies, but is best known for his roles as Flash Gordon and Buck Rogers.

4. HELENE MADISON (gold; 1932 100-metre freestyle)

Madison, who once set 16 world records in 161.2 months, was invariably described by sportswriters as 'shapely'. After her Olympic triumph, she played an Amazon captain of the guards in the 1933 satire The Warrior's Husband. Unfortunately, her performance was undistinguished and she never acted again.

5. SONJA HENIE (3 golds; 1928, 1932 and 1936 figure skating)

Henie's first film, One in a Million (1937), was a box-office winner, and nine more followed. Although her acting was never as smooth as her skating, her Hollywood career brought her great financial success.

6.-7.GLENN MORRIS (gold; 1936 decathlon) and ELEANOR HOLM (gold; 1932 100-metre backstroke)

Tarzan's Revenge (1938) starred two Olympic champions as Tarzan and Jane. Unfortunately, Holm was described as looking 'bored' throughout the film, and reviewers found Morris's performance 'disappointing' and 'listless'. Holm never acted again.

8. HAROLD SAKATA (silver; 1948 light-heavyweight weightlifting)

After the Olympics, Sakata pursued a successful career as a professional wrestler and then moved on to acting. He appeared in eight films, but it was his first role that gained him international stardom - the evil Oddjob in Goldfinger (1964).

9. CAROL HEISS (gold; 1960 figure skating)

Heiss, described by Variety as 'a fetching lass', made her film debut in the title role in Snow White and the Three Stooges (1961). The film was panned, but she received praise for her acting, singing and, of course, her skating. However, she never appeared in another movie.

10. JEAN-CLAUDE KILLY (3 golds; 1968 Alpine skiing)

Killy co-starred as a con-man ski instructor in the mediocre 1972 film Snow Job.

11. CORNISHMAN V (2 golds; 1968 and 1972 three-day event)

The only non-human Olympic medallist to pursue a successful film career, Cornishman V helped two different riders to victory in equestrian events. He later appeared in Dead Cert (1974), based on a Dick Francis novel, and International Velvet (1978).

12. BRUCE JENNER (gold; 1976 decathlon)

Jenner's one and only film appearance was in the loud and awful 1980 film Can't Stop the Music. He played a staid lawyer who is drawn into the irresistibly fun New York disco scene.

13. MARK BRELAND (gold; 1984 welterweight boxing)

Breland is one of the few athletes to appear in a movie before he appeared in the Olympics. In 1983 he received good reviews for his role in The Lords of Discipline. He played the first black cadet in a Southern military academy.

Note: Among the dozens of other Olympic athletes who have appeared in movies are 1924 pole-vault champion Lee Barnes, who served as a standin stuntman for Buster Keaton in College (1972); 1948 and 1952 decathlon champion Bob Mathias, who appeared in four films, including It Happened in Athens (1962) with Jayne Mansfield, and 1952 and 1956 triple jump champion Adhemar Ferreira da Silva, who appeared in the internationally acclaimed film Black Orpheus (1958). Ken Richmond, who won a bronze medal as a wrestler in 1952, was better known as the muscleman who struck the gong at the beginning of J. Arthur Rank films.

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: members.tripod .com

 

 

BASEBALL CATCHER QUOTES

"When we lost, I couldn't sleep at night. When we win, I can't sleep at night. But, when you win, you wake up feeling better."
(Joe Torre, catcher and manager)

"Bob Gibson's the luckiest pitcher I've ever seen. . . .He always picks the night to pitch when the other team doesn't score any runs."
(Tim McCarver, catcher)

"God was never a catcher because, if He was, there would never have been a knuckle ball pitcher."
(Contributed by Captain Jack Kirby, U.S. Navy Dental Corps)

Mike Macfarlane, Kansas City Royals catcher, after K.C. beat the Oakland A's 3-1 on only one hit:
That was a maximization of a minimization of hits. April 27, 1992

Junior Ortiz, Cleveland Indians catcher, after going 0 for 3 while playing with his left contact lens in his right eye and his right lens in his left eye:
When the pitcher threw a fastball low and outside, it looked like a fastball high and inside. June 8, 1992

Detroit Tigers catcher Bill Freehan, who had been hit 20 times by pitched balls that season:
They ought to stop it before somebody gets hurt. Sep 2, 1968

Bob Uecker, Milwaukee Braves rookie, who had hit one homer and was rooming with Eddie Mathews:
Between me and my roommate, we've hit 400 major league home runs. March 18, 1963

Johnny Bench, Hall of Famer, when asked how he felt about Carlton Fisk's breaking his career record for home runs by a catcher:
I was thinking about making a comeback, until I pulled a muscle vacuuming. Sep 10, 1990

One thing you learn as a Cub fan: when you bought your ticket, you could bank on seeing the bottom of the ninth inning.
(Joe Garagiola, former catcher and announcer)

This is a tough yard for a hitter when the air conditioning is blowing in.
(Bob Boone, Philadelphia Phillies catcher, on the Astrodome, 1976)

There were times last year when people looked at the scoreboard and thought my batting average was the temperature.
(Buck Martinez, Toronto Blue Jays catcher, 1985)

We play like King Kong one day and like Fay Wray the next.
(Terry Kennedy, San Diego Padres catcher, 1983)

You can't win them all.
(Connie Mack, former catcher and Philadelphia A's manager after losing 117 games, 1916)

We catchers don't want the credit and we don't want the blame. I've never called for a hanging curveball in my life." (David Ross, Cincinnati Reds catcher, 2007)

"Baseball is like church -- many attend, but few understand." (Wes Westrum, catcher)

Tim McCarver, the Philadelphia Phillie who caught all of Steve Carlton's games:
When Steve and I die, we are going to be buried in the same cemetery, 60' 6" apart. June 6, 1977

Actually, the best thing about playing at home is that you are not on the road.
(Darrell Porter, St. Louis Cardinals catcher)

Being a winner as a player is getting the most from your ability. Being a winner as a manager is not getting fired.
(Joe Torre, Former catcher and New York Mets manager, 1978)

Most people don't understand catchers. For example, Jerry Grote is a catcher who hits. Johnny Bench is a hitter who catches. There is a big difference.
(Joe Torre, catcher)

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: newser.com

Russian Investing in ... WNBA Stars?  

Posted Mar 26, 08 12:45 PM

(newser) – Basketball-crazy Russian billionaire Shabtai von Kalmanovic is pouring money into women's hoops—flying WNBA players to Russia in the off-season and paying them 10 times what they make in the US. Players like Diana Taurasi are put up in luxury digs and chauffeured around. "They should be treated like people of art, like stars," Kalmanovic tells the Los Angeles Times.

Kalmanovic made his money constructing buildings in black sections of apartheid South Africa. He has been linked romantically to Liza Minnelli, the Times reports, and imprisoned in Israel for being a Soviet spy. Players getting the star treatment don't seem to care much about their employer's past, however. "I don't know those things to be true or not," says one.

Related News    Group of Seattle Women Buy WNBA's Storm

• Jan 9, 08 10:29 AM
  Though the NBA's Seattle SuperSonics could be on the way to Oklahoma City, the WNBA's Storm appears set to remain in the Emerald City thanks to a deal by four local women to buy the women's basketball franchise. The foursome, which includes a pair of Microsoft executives, will pay Sonics owner Clay Bennett $10 million, the Seattle Post-Intelligencer reports

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: volleyballadvisors.com

Volleyball Quotes
from the Best Players

Explore these current volleyball quotes from the best players in the world, including Misty May and Kerri Walsh among others.


Volleyball Quotes - Misty May Olympic Gold Medalist

"On the Women's side, I feel that every country is a threat. The Olympic Games brings out the best in people and all the teams that we face are great. On the Men's side, it would be awesome to see the USA on top but again, the competition is so fierce." --Misty May about Beijing Olympic Games 2004.

It takes a lot of hard work and dedication just like any pro sport. Especially for beach volleyball you don't have to be tall or as fast as other sports. You just have to have the skills. --Misty May

"Kerri and I stay motivated because we hate to lose. What's great about beach volleyball is you can always find something to get better at. I don't think about losing. It could happen. I just go out there and play. I couldn't tell you any numbers or winning streaks. I just go out and do it." --Misty May

On the intense travel schedule: "We just got back from Berlin, and at this point in the summer it's like, my head is here, my body has no idea what's going on. You're nine hours ahead, you're three hours behind, who knows. It definitely takes its toll, especially the international travel." --Misty May


Volleyball Quotes - Kerri Walsh Olympic Gold Medalist

"We are really hungry (for victory). We want to show the world how good we can be." Kerri Walsh in 2008 referring to their ultimate success and hunger for improvement in the future.

"I love that our sport is sexy. I think it is appropriately so." --Kerri Walsh

"We don't have a World Series or a Super Bowl, so to be able to come home with a gold medal is amazing. I want to do it again in four more years." –-Kerri Walsh

"I much prefer playing with her than against her"—Kerri Walsh about her partner Misty May

Volleyball Quotes – from the Best Coaches in the World

Argentinean head coach for Poland, Raul Lozano said a combination of skill and mentality had made Poland strong.
"We are working a lot on technical things and on concentration during certain situations in the game. I am not sure which is the most important, but working on these things together will make a good result."

"I feel proud of the players and happy for the lessons they taught me, because I was not able to do that as a player." Avital Selinger NED, ex- player, after Netherland's women won its first international competition ever.

"Simply we play each match to win not any other possibility so we put this strategy before any match whatever the standard of the opponent strong or weak. We came here seeking for the trophy not just to play for good ranking and there is a big difference between these two situations." Polish Men's head coach Raul Lozano

"If we want to get to the top in Europe, we always have to give 120 percent – on the court and also off the court. From the first eye opening in the morning until the last eye closing in the evening we got to work hard for our goals." -- Mauro Berruto, Coach from Italy

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: icing.org

CURLING HUMOR \ QUOTES

THE SUNDAY DRAW & CURLING:

All people who curl instead of going to church meetings will be glad to know that curling is a legitimate religious activity, with scriptural sanction. For example, the Bible ..

.. speaks to the beginner who is assigned as Lead:
"He that is without sin among you, let him cast the first stone." (John 8:7)

.. urges the Second whose Lead has drawn two stones into the house:
"Be thou a guard unto them." (Ezekiel 38:7)

.. confirms a Second's personal resolution, as his Skip throws a take-out:
"I will sweep with the besom of destruction." (Isaiah 14:23)

.. describes the Vice(-skip)'s shots:
"The rocks are thrown down by him." (Nahum 1:6)

.. and notes the remarks of surprise and joy made by his Skip:
"Behold he smote the rock" (Psalm 78:20)
"Their rock is removed out of place." (Job 14:8)

.. makes only one comment about the activity of the Skip:
"Why stand ye here all the day idle?" (Matthew 20:16)

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: icing.org

TOP TEN REASONS WHY CURLING HAS REPLACED SEX AS THE NUMBER ONE INDOOR SPORT:

10. Men don't fall asleep when play is completed.

 9. In Mixed Curling, women always shoot first.

 8. The Iceman always cleans the sheets after you play.

 7. Short is not always bad.

 6. You can use your rubber more than once.

 5. You get to shoot your rocks 16 times in just one game.

 4. The harder you stroke, the further it goes.

 3. You can score more than once in each end.

 2. You can do it in eight houses in less than two hours.

 1. In Mixed Curling, it's acceptable to play with your best friend's wife!

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: icing.org

WOT HO, THE GRANITE  (ALL ABOUT CURLING):

Did you know that Shakespeare was an astute observer of the curling scene? The Bard's plays are crammed with references to the Roaring Game. Look them up in ..

.. King John (a word to curlers in general):
    "Blow each dust, each straw, each little rub, Out of the path."

.. A Midsummer Night's Dream:
    "To show our simple skill, That is the beginning of our end."

.. Cymbeline (tactics when you're leading and you've got the hammer):
    "I'll throw it into the creek, Behind our rock."

.. The Merry Wives of Windsor (a skip's advice on Beginners' night):
    "Who's there, I trow! Come near the house, I pray you."

.. Troilus and Cressida (a comment on an obvious novice):
    "Look you what hacks are on his helmet!"

Shakespeare even had curling positions down pat. From ..

.. The Merchant of Venice:
    "Allay with some cold drops of modesty, Thy skipping spirit."

.. Othello:
    "Do you perceive how he laughed at his vice?"

.. Richard the Third:
    "Richard the Second here was hack'd to death."

.. King Lear:
    " 'Tis the times' plague, when madmen lead the blind."

Finally, a word for all curlers. From ..

.. As You Like It:
    "Sweep, you fat and greasy citizens."

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