FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: chatterfromthedugout.com

BASEBALL TRIVIA
Trivia about Eddie Gaedel and other baseball one-liners
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Click here to view ===> ONE-LINERS
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: emcmlb.blogspot.com

BASEBALL HUMOR
Quotes and one-liners from a Texas Rangers baseball fanatic
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Click here to view ===> TEXAS RANGERS
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: thesun.co.uk

SOCCER QUOTES
Quotes by Kevin Keegan
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THE KEVIN KEEGAN SHOW
(Quotes, slide show, video)
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Click here to view ===> KEEGAN
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: home.earthlink.net

Image: blushingbuyer.co.uk
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BASEBALL QUOTES
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"When I got back to the clubhouse, I just sat down on my stool and held my head in my hands, like I was going to start crying. I heard somebody come up to me, and it was little Timmy Berra, [Yogi Berra's boy] standing there next to me. He tapped me on the knee, nice and soft, and I figured he was going to say something nice to me you know, like 'You keep hanging in there' or something like that. But all he did was look at me, and then he said in his little kid's voice, 'You stink.'"
-- Mickey Mantle, after an awful game in which he struck out three times in a row.
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Click here to view full article ===> QUOTES
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References to:
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Timmy Berra
Curt Flood
Satchel Paig
Jose Canseco
Don Sutton
Tim McCarver
Bob Gibson
Steve Carlton
Sparky Anderson
Rube Bressler
Alan Bannister
Al Rosen
Lou Gehrig
Don Drysdale
Dusty Baker
Joe DiMaggio
Jim Kern
Walter Johnson
Ron Hunt
Terry Mulholland
Juan Gonzalez
Bob Costas
Leo Durocher
Brooks Robinson
Pete Rose
Jackie Robinson
George Brett
Ted Williams
George Will
Mickey Mantle
Ed Lynch
Roy Campanella
Craig Biggio
Chuck Knoblauch
Pat Jordan
Yogi Berra
George W. Bush
Wade Miller
Tony Pena
Mark Grace
Ryan Klesko
Curt Schilling
Tony La Russa
Rick Ankiel
Larry Dierker
Albert Spalding
PedroMartinez
Gerald Williams
Rogers Hornsby
F.P. Santangelo
James Earl Jones
Field of Dreams
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: news.bbc.co.uk

Image: channel9.msdn.com

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SPORTS QUOTES

Quotes from 9/16/08 sports edition of news.bbc.co.uk

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Click here to view ===> QUOTES

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References to:

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Leon Knight

Robinho

Roger Federer

Andy Murray

Don King

Jeremy GillPapac

Sasa Paul

Mitchell Thompson

Tanni Grey-

Paralympic

David Roberts

Jonny Wilkinson

Justin Langer

Steve McNamara

Ricky Hatton

Paulie Malignaggi

Usain Bolt

Lewis Hamilton

Lloyd Kerry

Lee Richardson

Gianfranco Zola

Alex Ferguson

Cristiano Ronaldo

Freddy Shepherd

Mike Ashley

Pietro Lo Monaco

Jose Mourinho

Dwight York

Roy Keane

Paul Jewell

Luiz Felipe Scolari

Gianfranco Zola

Carlton Cole

Laurent Blanc

Eric Gerets

Nick Faldo

Aimee Lewis

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: famequotes.com

THE "TICKER"

Image: faculty.washington.edu

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SPORTS QUOTES

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There's no pressure in baseball. Pressure is when the doctor is getting ready to cut you, take your heart out, and put it on a table."

- Charlie Manuel

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"Ace Running a casino is like robbing a bank with no cops around. For guys like me, Las Vegas washes away your sins. It's like a morality car wash."

- Casino (the movie)

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"Ace In Vegas, everybody's gotta watch everybody else. Since the players are looking to beat the casino, the dealers are watching the players. The box men are watching the dealers. The floor men are watching the box men. The pit bosses are watching the floor men. The shift bosses are watching the pit bosses. The casino manager is watching the shift bosses. I'm watching the casino manager. And the eye-in-the-sky is watching us all."

- Casino (the movie)

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"Just when you think there's nothing to write about, Nixon says, 'I am not a crook.' Jimmy Carter says, 'I have lusted after women in my heart.' President Reagan says, 'I have just taken a urinalysis test, and I am not on dope.'"

- Art Buchwald

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The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it."

- Joan Rivers

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"One of these days in your travels, a guy is going to come up to you and show you a nice brand-new deck of cards on which the seal is not yet broken, and this guy is going to offer to bet you that he can make the Jack of Spades jump out of the deck and squirt cider in your ear. But, son, do not bet this man, for as sure as you are standing there, you are going to end up with an earful of cider."

- Damon Runyon

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"A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water."

- Carl Reiner

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"The snow doesn't give a soft white damn whom it touches."

- e e cummings

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"One's first book, kiss, home run, is always the best."

- Clifton Fadiman

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The sun don't shine on the same dog's ass all the time."
- Catfish Hunter

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"A man is not paid for having a head and hands, but for using them."

- Elbert Hubbard

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"A professional is someone who can do his best when he doesn't feel like it."

- Alistair Cooke

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"Success is never final, but failure can be."

- Bill Parcells

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