SPECIAL EDITORIAL NOTE FROM SPORTS_NUT, 2/26/2011
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Welcome to the retirement edition of Funny Sports Quotes.
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The Funny Sports Quotes blog was created in 11/2007 after I could see I could become a blogger very easily using Google's 3-step process for creating a blog online.
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For me, like most, work is not my idea of a fun experience, so I had to choose the topic that I would most enjoy pursuing and that, for me, was finding and posting funny sports quotes for entertaining and, in some cases, educating an audience on facets of sports even the most ardent sports fans may not have been aware of.
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At the same time, I decided to compile a database of funny sports quotes that sports fans and quote fans could visit for "one-stop" shopping, thereby helping them to avoid the need to search elsewhere for sports quotes.
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So, from 11/2007 until 2/2011. I have compiled quotes on the Funny Sports Quotes blog and its sister blog, FSQuotes, that is accessible only from the Funny Sports Quotes blog.
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As of 2/26/2011, I believe I have achieved my objective first set in 11/2007, which signals for me the end of my funny sports quotes database project.
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Kindly note that I have already made the last post (SI Swimsuit) to the blog, shut off further entries to Comments, and I will shut off the email address sports.quotes@gmail.com on 03/14/2011.
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Also note that many features previously cited on this page have been removed, so that a bare-bones FSQ remains for your future reference.
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I do hope that my venture was successful in bringing a smile to your face or a skip to your step, since that was all FSQ was created for, your entertainment and pleasure.
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In closing, I wish you and yours, Godspeed!
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Saturday, February 2, 2008

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: sportingmadness.blogspot.com

THE BEST QUOTES OF THE YEAR

There were a lot of memorable moments in sports last year, but most were for less-than-stellar reasons. Scandals erupted in every sport from baseball (Steroidgate) to football (Spygate), basketball (Refgate), soccer (Riotgate), and cycling (Landisgate). However, there was never any shortage of good material for sportswriters. Here's some of the year's best quotes:

Baseball


"It's not lies if we knew the truth." - Toronto Blue Jays GM J.P. Ricciardi on the misinformation he spread about closer B.J. Ryan's elbow

"I hope he arouses the fire that's dormant in the innermost recesses of my soul. I plan to face him with the zeal of a challenger." - Seattle outfielder Ichiro Suzuki (via a translator) on facing countryman Daisuke Matsuzaka

"He looking for changeup. He find it." - Arizona pitcher Yusmeiro Petit, on giving up Barry Bonds' 740th home run



"As anyone can plainly see, I'm 5'6 1/2'' and a strapping 150. And unlike some people, I came by all of it naturally." - NBC broadcaster Bob Costas, on Barry Bonds calling him a "little midget man"

"Hey, it looks like Barry Bonds might end up in pinstripes after all." - The Orlando Sentinel's Mike Bianchi after Bonds was indicted

"The Dalai Lama is here in the United States. This morning, he was awarded the congressional gold medal for his contribution to peace, human rights, religious understanding. Unfortunately, a few hours after the ceremony, he was stripped of his medal after testing positive for performance-enhancing drugs." - Jimmy Kimmel

Football (American)

"I don't condone dogfighting, catfighting, cockfighting or bullfighting, but before it comes out in the papers, I have a confession: I bet heavily on hamster lacrosse."
- Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle on Michael Vick

"Some people get vasectomies. I used to give them." - Former NFL lineman Conrad Dobler, considered by many to be one of the dirtiest players in league history:

"He may be drawing on someone else's experiences." - Former New York Giants running back Tiki Barber on the announcement of Dallas Cowboys' wide receiver Terrell Owens' new children's book, Little T Learns to Share

"We had better signs, but Belichick stole them." - Sign in the stands when the Baltimore Ravens played Belichick's New England Patriots in the wake of the Spygate scandal


Football (European, otherwise known as soccer)

"If Rafa (Benitez) said he wanted to buy Snoogy Doogy, we would back him." - Liverpool co-owner George Gillett showing his faith in his manager by giving him money to buy a mispronounced rapper (Snoop Dogg)

"You know, omelettes, eggs? If you have no eggs, you have no omelette. And it depends upon the quality of the eggs. In the supermarket you have Class One, Two and Three eggs. Some are more expensive and make better omelettes. So when Class One eggs are in Waitrose and you cannot go there, you have a problem." - Ex-Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho, on his injury list causing problems

"To be the England manager you must win every game, not do anything in your private life and hopefully not earn too much money." - Former England manager (and current Manchester City manager) Sven-Goran Eriksson on the demands of the national team job

"Had I not become a footballer, I think I would have been a virgin." - At least Peter Crouch recognizes that his looks aren't great

"David Beckham is coming to the United States. People say he could make a huge impact on the way Americans ignore soccer." - Jay Leno


Hockey


"If one hockey player ever does that show he's never gonna live to tell about it." - Detroit Red Wings defenceman Chris Chelios on Dancing With The Stars


Rugby

"Head coach of the England team demands management skills that Brian does not have. Somehow we'd managed to turn our World Cup campaign into a Monty Python sketch - called The Life of Brian." - English writer Lawrence Dallaglio on national coach Brian Ashton

"We went into South Africa with no direction, no shape and consequently no belief. It was the worst week I had known in international rugby." - English player Mike Catt on his team's initial poor performance at the Rugby World Cup (they went on to place second in the tournament)


Basketball


"If I have offended any cowboys, any Texans, any horses or anybody else, I want to apologize for this." - L.A. Lakers coach Phil Jackson "apologizes" for his Brokeback Mountain reference

"When we lose, I blame the referees anyway." - Golden State Warriors guard Baron Davis, on why the Tim Donaghy scandal won't cause him to look at refs more closely

"I want to buy an island. Because Diana Ross has an island. Marvin Brando had an island." - Washington Wizards guard Gilbert Arenas should bone up on his cinematic history before considering the real-estate market

Golf

"I'll be in my villa in Malaga in 34 degrees smoking a cigar and drinking wine. You play in the rain." - Miguel Angel Jiminez to fellow golfer Paul McGinley, on why he's skipping the European Open in Dublin


Tennis

"Um, we both owned Alaska at one point." - Tennis player Dmitry Tursunov on the similarities between his native country (Russia) and his adopted one (America)

Boxing

"I'm not as top as I'd like to be, but I'm topper than others." - Heavyweight champion Vladimir Klitschko.

Formula 1 Racing

"This is the best feeling I ever had. You cannot compare it to sex. But you know, I would say it is better than sex. It is!" - Lewis Hamilton after winning the Canadian Grand Prix




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