NASCAR HUMOR
Humor from David Letterman's Top Ten List
Humor from the year 2007
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For the first time in the history of the LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN broadcasts, tonight’s LATE SHOW Top Ten is instead a Top Twelve, presented by the 12 NASCAR drivers in the Chase for the Nextel Cup.
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“The Top 12 Reasons I Love Racing . . .”
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12. Clint Bowyer: “We’ve got special mirrors that show objects the size that they actually are.
11. Kevin Harvick: “Sometimes back in the garages there’s horseplay with the airhose.”
10. Jeff Burton: “Between the G-forces and the fumes, I’m loopy most of the season.”
9. Kyle Busch: “Switch the ‘R’ and the ‘C’ in ‘Racing’ and you get ‘Caring.’”
8. Matt Kenseth: “Can hold 8 gigs of music on my new iHelmet.”
7. Martin Turex, Jr.: “In a pinch, checkered flags make a lovely tablecloth.”
6. Denny Hamlin: “Two more wins and I get to marry Ashley Judd.”
5. Kurt Busch: “You can talk to your car and pretend you’re David Hasselhoff.”
4. Carl Edwards: “How many people can say their “office” goes 200 miles per hour.”
3. Tony Stewart: “Driving fast and starting fights.”
2. Jeff Gordon: “It’s not one of those sports you have to inject stuff in your ass to be good.”
1. Jimmie Johnson: “Unlike most guys, I like it when my wife says, ‘You’re too fast.’”
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