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CRICKET QUOTES AND INSULTS
For six days, thou shall push up and down the line, but on the seventh day thou shall swipe. Doug Padgett, 1969
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Of all the races in the Galaxy, only the English could possibly revive the memory of the most horrific wars ever to sunder the Universe and transform it into into what I'm afraid is generally regarded as an incomprehensibly dull and pointless game Douglas Adams, Life the Universe and Everything (1982).
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In Affectionate Remembrance of ENGLISH CRICKET, which died at the Oval on 29th AUGUST, 1882, Deeply lamented by a large circle of sorrowing friends and acquaintances R.I.P.N.B. - The body will be cremated and the ashes taken to Australia. Reginald Shirley Brooks, published in The Sporting Times (1882). See wikipedia on The Ashes.
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When you win the toss – bat. If you are in doubt, think about it, then bat. If you have very big doubts, consult a colleague – then bat. Attributed to W. G. Grace.
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After years of patient study (and with cricket there can be no other kind), I have decided that there is nothing wrong with the game that the introduction of golf carts wouldn't fix in a hurry. Bill Bryson, Down Under (2000)
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It is not true that the English invented cricket as a way of making all other human endeavours look interesting and lively; that was merely an unintended side effect. I don't wish to denigrate a sport that is enjoyed by millions, some of them awake and facing the right way, but it is an odd game. Bill Bryson, Down Under (2000)
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Cricket needs brightening up a bit. My solution is to let players drink at the beginning of the game, not after. It always works in our picnic matches.Paul Hogan
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That cricket is going to stay in India there cannot be a shadow of a doubt; it has taken hold all over the country, and chokras can be seen playing in every village with any sort of old bat and ball that they can lay hands on. I should hope that it will do something to get over any racial antipathy; for instance, it must, I think, bring the several races together more and more, in a spirit of harmony that should be the spirit in which cricket is played. Unquestionably, it arouses excitement and enthusiasm, and extreme ambition that one's own side should succeed, bit it also ought to lead to friendliness, and that is what is needed in India. East will always be East, and West, West, but the crease is not a very broad line of demarcation – so narrow, indeed, that it ought to help bring about friendly relations. Lord Harris, A Few Short Runs (1921)
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Cricket needs brightening up a bit. My solution is to let players drink at the beginning of the game, not after. It always works in our picnic matches. Paul Hogan
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Cricket had plunged me into politics long before I was aware of it. When I did turn into politics I did not have too much to learn. C. L. R. James, Beyond a Boundary (1963)
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Cricket is battle and service and sport and art. Douglas Jardine, captain of England, 1931-34. When's the game itself going to begin? Groucho Marx, watching a match at Lord's, attributed in Colin Jarman, The Guinness Dictionary of Sports Quotations (1990).
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Cricket civilises people and creates good gentlemen. I want everyone to play cricket in Zimbabwe; I want ours to be a nation of gentlemen. Robert Mugabe, attributed in Helen Exley, Cricket Quotations (1992)
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"If a cricketer, for instance, suddenly decided to go into a school and batter a lot of people to death with a cricket bat, which he could do very easily, I mean, are you going to ban cricket bats?" Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh (1996) Amid calls to ban firearms after the Dunblane shooting.
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