Image: i.dailymail.co.uk.
SOCCER QUOTES
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Luiz Felipe Scolari: in his own words
Never one to disappoint, here are some of the new Chelsea coach's more infamous outbursts
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"I'll wait for you outside, mate" – Scolari books a date with a referee who ordered him from Brazil's bench in 2000.
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"He was going to hit [Ricardo] Quaresma and I defended him" - pugilist Phil stands up for his players by thumping the Serbian defender Ivica Dragutinoviç in a Euro 2008 qualifier last September.
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"Who was to blame out there was the referee. Two metres offside!" - Scolari's alternative reason for punching Dragutinoviç.
"Who was to blame out there was the referee. Two metres offside!" - Scolari's alternative reason for punching Dragutinoviç.
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"I'm not perfect. Everyone makes mistakes, and I lost my head here" - the suits from the Portuguese FA prise a confession from chastened Phil over the Serbian punch-up.
"I'm not perfect. Everyone makes mistakes, and I lost my head here" - the suits from the Portuguese FA prise a confession from chastened Phil over the Serbian punch-up.
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"If someone talks about my private life, for example, I'll give them a good punching. I'm not interested in suing. I like to sort things out my way" - that sounds like a challenge for the British press.
"If someone talks about my private life, for example, I'll give them a good punching. I'm not interested in suing. I like to sort things out my way" - that sounds like a challenge for the British press.
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"Jesus said we should turn the other cheek. Unfortunately, Figo is not Jesus Christ" - and nor did Jesus headbutt Mark van Bommel, as Luis Figo just had in June 2006.
"Jesus said we should turn the other cheek. Unfortunately, Figo is not Jesus Christ" - and nor did Jesus headbutt Mark van Bommel, as Luis Figo just had in June 2006.
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"I believe firmly in astrology. Since I was a kid, the stars told me I was a winner" - he's a Scorpio, by the way. The same as the Chelsea owner Roman Abramovich.
"I believe firmly in astrology. Since I was a kid, the stars told me I was a winner" - he's a Scorpio, by the way. The same as the Chelsea owner Roman Abramovich.
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"When the ball goes to his feet it doesn't cry. When it goes to my feet it cries"- the difference between Zinedine Zidane and Scolari.
"When the ball goes to his feet it doesn't cry. When it goes to my feet it cries"- the difference between Zinedine Zidane and Scolari.
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"I don't want this situation involving England because in two days during which I was not coach, I never agreed to anything, my life was invaded. My privacy was totally under siege" - the Sensitive One rejects England.
"I don't want this situation involving England because in two days during which I was not coach, I never agreed to anything, my life was invaded. My privacy was totally under siege" - the Sensitive One rejects England.
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"I think Pele knows nothing about soccer. He's done nothing as a coach and his analysis turns out to be always wrong. If you plan on winninga title, you do the opposite to what Pele says" - World Cup winner Scolari reveals the secret of his success.
"I think Pele knows nothing about soccer. He's done nothing as a coach and his analysis turns out to be always wrong. If you plan on winninga title, you do the opposite to what Pele says" - World Cup winner Scolari reveals the secret of his success.
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"[He] tortured a lot but there is no illiteracy in Chile" - Big Phil offers a Thatcheresque critique of General Pinochet's leadership
"[He] tortured a lot but there is no illiteracy in Chile" - Big Phil offers a Thatcheresque critique of General Pinochet's leadership
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