SPORTS QUOTES
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"Hockey's Eric Lindros has retired at 34, hastened by a series of concussions. Friends tell Lindros he had a terrific career."
— Greg Cote, of The Miami Herald
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"Chronically Concussed Eric Lindros Announces Retirement From Citibank."
— Headline on theonion.com
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"I swear on my mother's life — my late mother's life."
— Snooker legend Alex Higgins, speaking with the BBC
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"I was going to call him to borrow money, but I think I'll hold on that."
— Charles Barkley, on reports that Michael Jordan finally settled his divorce from Juanita Jordan for US $168-million.
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"I feel very comfortable with my decision. I think there is a problem that still exists. Now that the divorce has taken place, we're not sure who gets custody of Billy Crystal."
— Former New York Yankees manager Joe Torre, on leaving the Bronx.
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"Sidney Crosby's One-Goal, Two-Assist Performance Saves Hockey."
— Headline on theonion.com.
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"Hey, it looks like Barry Bonds might end up in pinstripes after all."
— Mike Bianchi, of the Orlando Sentinel, after Bonds was indicted.
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