FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES: 10/01/2009

Saturday, October 31, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: maxim.com

BASEBALL QUOTES
Baseball managers' rants are always memorable baseball quotes
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Baseball's Greatest Raging Rants Caught on Tape
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Rants are quotes unleashed vehemently and viciously,
and, in baseball, the source can be the managers or
players, while the target can be whatever the ranters
choose!
.
Baseball managers are the source of the 8 rants
presented, with 5 of the managers cited having
World Series managerial experience - any manager,
no matter how great, can lose it under the right
circumstances.
.
"LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE."
.
Click here to view ===> BASEBALL MANAGER RANTS
=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: drunkjaysfans.com

BASEBALL QUOTES
Fox Sports has added Ozzie Guillen to its 2009 World Series crew
.
Fox has selected Ozzie Guillen to do pre and post game
analysis for the 2009 World Series games.
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Here are some baseball quotes Qzzie has become so famous for:
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On himself:
.
Then they have a Mexican win the World Series in two years. And they're saying he doesn't have experience, he never managed in baseball before. Well, too fucking bad. What's the difference? No one knows the difference anyway (between Mexico and Venezuela).
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On his team:
.
We have to apologize to the fans watching this thing because I'm tired of watching this day in and day out. Wow. You thought I was a good manager. Well, look at me now. I'm not that good. You're as good as your players are.
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On Magglio Ordonez:
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He's a cunt, that's what he is. He's another Venezuelan cunt. Fuck him. He has an enemy. Now he has a big one. He knows I can fuck him a lot of different ways. He better shut the fuck up and play for the Detroit Tigers. Why do I have to apologize to him? Who the fuck is Magglio Ordonez? Why ever talk about me? He doesn't do shit for me. But if he thinks I'm his enemy, he has a big enemy. He knows me.
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On Alex Rios:
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What have I seen from Rios? A lot of outs. The only batting ninth guy making $5 million was me. This mother fucker is making $10, $12, $14 million, he ain't going to be batting ninth [in 2010]. I'm going to make sure he earns his money. But right now I have to put him there because he's struggling. Next year, if we have Rios batting ninth we're in deep shit once again.
.
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: zellspinstripeblog.com

WORLD SERIES QUOTES
Baseball quotes from World Series games after 1995
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1996 World Series Quotes:
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“They [the Braves after taking 2–0 lead in the Series] said they could beat the ‘27 Yankees. But they forgot about the ‘96 Yankees.”
—Joe Girardi after winning World Series (from Baseball Weekly).
.
“We play today, we win today. ‘Das it.”
—Mariano Duncan, before Game 6 at Yankee Stadium.
.
“The Yankees have marched through Georgia, and where have we heard that before?”
—Vin Scully, radio broadcast at the end of Game 5
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1998 World Series Quotes:
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“From ear to ear, you can feel Darryl Strawberry smiling.”
—FOX announcer Tim McCarver after the Yankees win.
Darryl had cancer and could not play in the 1998 postseason.
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2000 World Series Quotes:
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“They’ll be talkin’ about this 40 years from now, and we’re here now.”
—Yankees fan and New Yorker Spike Lee explaining the importance of the Series.
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“Broken bat, foul ball off to the right side. And the barrel of the bat, came out to Clemens and he picked it up and threw it back at Piazza! I don’t know what Clemens had in mind!!”
—Gary Cohen (WFAN)
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2001 World Series Quotes
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“Mystique and Aura? Those are dancers at a nightclub.”
—Curt Schilling when asked before the series if the Diamondbacks (only in the league since 1998) would have any trouble when faced with the tradition-rich Yankees.
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“Swung on and drilled to right field, going back Sanders, on the track, at the wall…See ya! See ya! See ya! A home run for Derek Jeter! He is Mr. November! Oh what a home run by Derek Jeter!”
—Michael Kay calling Derek Jeter’s walk-off home run in game four after noticing a sign that says, “Mr. November.”
.
=================

Friday, October 30, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: phillyburbs.com

BASEBALL TRIVIA \ VIDEO SLIDE SHOW
.
Just in case you missed game 1 of the 2009 World
Series, here is a video slide show of game highlights
for you to view.
.
Click here to view ===> WORLD SERIES 2009, GAME 1
.
Source: youtube.com
.
================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: calgarysun.com

RUBEN AMARO, JR.

PHILLIES GENERAL MANAGER

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BASEBALL TRIVIA \ QUOTES
Profile of early baseball career of Phillies GM, Ruben Amaro, Jr.
.
Click here to view ===> RUBEN AMARO, JR.
================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: esquire.com

Image: img217.imageshack.us

BASEBALL QUOTES

Quotes from a 2002 Esquire article on George Steinbrenner

Yankees owner George Steinbrenner, now retired while

his two sons run the Yankees, shares his thoughts about

his life and the game of baseball.

I never ask a man to work harder than I work.

Don't ever get so serious that you can't laugh at yourself.

Don't just drink from the gymnasium fountain. Drink from every fountain on campus.

Click here to view ===> GEORGE STEINBRENNER QUOTES

=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: See body of message

Image: onlinesportshandicapping.com

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BASEBALL HUMOR \ QUOTES
Best baseball trash talkers get it on in The Big Apple and Philly!

Aw, sukey, sukey, now - it's getting juicy now!!!

The best trash talkers from the American League

are taking on the best trash talkers from the National

League and ain't nobody playing, y'all!!!

The Big Apple boys are not scared of the Philly

Phanatic and his boys and somebody's going down

one way or the other!!!

For the 2009 World Series, one baseball team will

win on the field and the best trash talking team will

win off the field!

LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!

(Coin toss won by NYC, so they're on!)

Click here to view ===> TRASH TALKING BY YANKEE FANS

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Source: nypost.com
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"Whoa! Don't be so mean, Yankees fans!"

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(Bring it, Philly - you're on!)

Click here to view ===> TRASH TALKING BY PHILLY FANS

Source: nydailynews.com

"Whoa! Can somebody page security?

--------

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May the best teams win, both on and off the field.

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Editor's note:

Both cities are known for trash talking, so, with that

kind of pride egging them on, I expect to see a

flurry of "yo ma ma" jokes any day now - call security!!!

===========

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: quotes.webcircle.com

KATE HUDSON, MOVIE ACTRESS

FAMOUS YANKEES FAN, 2009

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Image:
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BASEBALL QUOTES
List of World Series, Phillies, and Yankees quotes
.
With the 2009 World Series set to begin on 10/28/2009,
here are quotes from yesteryear honoring players in the
World Series, and former players from the Phillies and
Yankees, the two teams pitted against each other for the
2009 championship.
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World Series Quotes:
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If I knew it was worth that much after I missed it, I would've run after it.
---
In 1998, on the baseball that dribbled through his legs in the 1986 World Series which had just sold for $93,000.00
William Joseph "Bill" Buckner
Boston Red Sox 1B
===
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Sparky Anderson says Don Gullett is going to the Hall of Fame after the World Series. I'm going to the Eliot Lounge.
---
William Francis "Spaceman" Lee
Boston Red Sox Pitcher
Contributed by: Tim Dermody
===
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As the ball left the bat, I said to myself two things. The first thing I said was, 'Hello, double.' The second thing I said was, 'Oh (bleep), HE'S out there."
---
On playing against OF Willie Mays in the 1962 World Series
Cletis Leroy "Clete" Boyer
New York Yankees 3B
===
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If he had, I would have knocked him down with the next pitch.
---
In a discussion of Babe Ruth's supposed "called shot" in the 1932 World Series, addressing whether Ruth had in fact pointed in the direction of the bleachers
Charles Henry "Charley" Root
Chicago Cubs Pitcher
===
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The best thing about playing for the Cubs is that you never have to worry about anyone stealing your World Series ring.
---
In putting together an inspirational and motivational book about Bill Veeck based on stories and insights from fans.
Pat Williams Author
====
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Phillies Quotes:
.
Don't all leave at once. Leave in groups of twos and threes. They're selling rocks out there at a dollar a pail and this way they can't get us all at once.
---
Upon returning to Philadelphia after a road trip in which their final game, the second of a double-header, resulted in a victory that ended a 23-game losing streak, and seeing several hundred diehard fans awaiting them at the airport in the wee hours
Frank Sullivan
Philadelphia Phillies Pitcher
===
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You hold it like this and throw the shit out of it.
---
To fellow Phillies pitcher Dick Ruthven on how to throw a slider
Steven Norman "Steve" Carlton
Philadelphia Phillies Pitcher
===
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I would walk down the lockers and Tug would see me coming and announce real loudly, "L.C., are you pitching today?" I'd say "Yes." And he'd shout, "So am I!"
---
That was the ritual. On teammate (1975-83) and former Phillies relief pitcher Tug McGraw
Larry Richard "L.C." Christenson
Philadelphia Phillies
Starting Pitcher
===
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I was only going three-quarters to 75 percent.
---
Upon returning to action after suffering a pelvic injury
Michael Scott Lieberthal
Philadelphia Phillies Catcher
===
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I've been released five times, I'm bald and I have a big nose. I'll make it through this.
---
On getting booed in Philadelphia
Terry Jon Francona
Philadelphia Phillies Manager
===
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Yankees Quotes:
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Never is a concept the Yankees won't ever come across.
---
Andrew Eugene Pettitte
New York Yankees Pitcher
Contributed by: Leash1230@aol.com
===
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He kind of lulls a hitter to sleep because his mechanics are smooth, not jerky. You time a pitcher on his windup, and so when he does it nice and slow, the batter goes nice and slow, and then the ball is suddenly there.
---
On Yankees closer Mariano Rivera
Alan Stuart Trammel
Detroit Tigers Hitting Coach
===
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Get really fat.
---
After his release by the Yankees, on what he planned to do next
---
Thomas Alan "Tom" Pagnozzi
New York Yankees Catcher
===
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I was with the Yankees the spring (Mike) Kekich and (Fritz) Peterson switched wives.
---
With his team having dealt with John Rocker's suspension, John Smoltz's season-ending injury, and Andres Galarraga's return from cancer, on whether he has ever had so tumultuous a spring
Robert Joseph "Bobby" Cox
Atlanta Braves Manager
Contributed by: Lee Gibbs
===
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Editor's note:

Because of image above, 4 quotes are listed for Yankees instead of 5.

=============

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: sportige.com

NBA BASKETBALL TRIVIA \ QUOTES
Blogger identifies his choices for funniest NBA player nicknames
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The Best nickname was given by Don Nelson, head coach of Golden State Warriors to Lithuanian Sarunas Jasikevicius who is back in Europe the past two seasons.
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Nelson couldn’t pronounce the name of his Point Guard, so instead of calling him by his career long nickname, used in every country he’s played in, Saras, what did Nelson call him - Jazzy Cabbages. That’s a rap.
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Click here to view ===> FUNNIEST NBA PLAYER NICKNAMES
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: footballbabble.com

Image: everybody-hates-chris.otavo.tv
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NFL FOOTBALL TRIVIA \ QUOTES
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50 NFL Players \ Prospects Who Became Actors
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NFL Player Profile: Terry Crews
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– Drafted in the 11th round of the 1991 NFL Draft, Crews played defensive end and linebacker for six seasons in the NFL. Afterwards, he made a name for himself in the entertainment industry, getting his first break as T-Money on a television show called Battle Dome. He’s also appeared in Training Day, Idiocracy, Click, The Longest Yard (as a convict obsessed with McDonalds) and Everybody Hates Chris.
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Click here to view ===> NFL PLAYERS WHO BECAME ACTORS
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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: 4online-gambling.com

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Image: hiddenbookshelf.com

GAMBLING QUOTES

"They gambled in the Garden of Eden, and they will again if there's another one."

- Richard Albert Canfield
.

"The roulette table pays nobody except him that keeps it. Nevertheless a passion for gaming is common, though a passion for keeping roulette tables is unknown."

- George Bernard Shaw

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"It can be argued that man's instinct to gamble is the only reason he is still not a monkey up in the trees."

- Mario Puzo
.

"Judged by the dollars spent, gambling is now more popular in America than baseball, the movies, and Disneyland-combined."

- Timothy L. O'Brien, Bad Bet (1998)
.

"They (slot machines) sit there like young courtesans, promising pleasures undreamed of, your deepest desires fulfilled, all lusts satiated."

- Frank Scoblete

Click here to view ===> GAMBLING QUOTES

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: mmawiz.com

MIXED MARTIAL ARTS (MMA) QUOTES
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“I fight because I can’t sing, I can’t dance, and it beats working all day. Now ask me a question that doesn’t sound so fucking stupid.”
– Phil Baroni
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“He wants to get in close to use that reach advantage.”
– Mike Goldberg
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“Don’t fear me … Fear the consequences.”
– Paul Buentello
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“I am very confident this fight can go either way.”
– Kem Shamrock
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Click here to view ====> MMA QUOTES
==================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: all-about-tennis.com

GORAN IVANISEVIC

Image: i.dailymail.co.uk

TENNIS QUOTES

Quotes by tennis player Goran Ivanisevic

"The trouble with me is that every match I play against five opponents: umpire, crowd, ball boys, court, and myself."

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"I wouldn't want to go to a sports psychiatrist, because when you're finished, you come out more crazy than you go in."

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"I still break rackets, but now I do it in a positive way."
.

"My fines? I pay more fines than some guys' career prize money on the tour."
.

"I think it's interesting, you have three movies in one match: horror, comedy, drama. It's fun. I enjoy it. I am like that. I don't like to change. And if I could choose, I would be the same again. Just me, and I like who I am."
.

"In every game I play there are three players in me that could surface anytime, Good Goran, Bad Goran, Crazy Goran! They can all serve aces."

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"I have so many runner-up cups that I am thinking of starting my own tea shop."

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"I do not want that 'plate' again." - coming into his fourth Wimbledon final having lost the three others.

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"Today's players, they do not know how. If you are going to throw it, you break it. You have to show commitment." (on throwing rackets)

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"I go kill myself" (after losing the Wimbledon 1998 final against Pete Sampras)

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"I woke up at 2 and went back to sleep at 3, I woke at 4 and went back to sleep at 5, when I next woke The Teletubbies were on TV, so I thought it must be time to get up" (on his night's sleep before the 2001 Final)
.

================

Thursday, October 22, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: mystudiyo.com

NFL FOOTBALL QUIZ
Test your knowledge of NFL referees and rules
.
Know NFL Zebras Quiz
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Click here to view ===> NFL ZEBRAS QUIZ
================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: city-data.com

WARREN SPAHN, HALL OF FAME PITCHER

Image: somaxsports.com

BASEBALL QUOTES

I said 'no guts' to a kid who went on to become a war hero and one of the greatest lefthanded pitchers you ever saw. You can't say I don't miss 'em when I miss 'em.

--- Casey Stengel, who farmed out Warren Spahn as a nervous rookie who declined to brush a hitter back with the 1942 Boston Braves . . . and managed him again, when Spahn turned up opening the 1965 season as a Met.

I played for Casey Stengel before and after he was a genius.

--- Warren Spahn, for his part. (Stengel, of course, managed twelve pennant winners and ten World Series champions with the Yankees, 1949-60.)

We try every way we can to kill this game but for some reason nothin' nobody does never hurts it.

--- Sparky Anderson.

Don't matter if you're ugly in this racket---all you got to do is hit the ball, and I never saw anyone hit one with his face.

--- Yogi Berra.

By the time you learn how to play this game properly, you can't play anymore.

--- Frank Howard.

Jesus H. Christ himself couldn't get me out!

--- Ted Williams.

On my tombstone it will read, "Cause of death: Boston Red Sox."

--- Cleveland Amory.

For most baseball fans, the saddest words of tongue or pen are, "Wait 'till next year."

For us Cub fans, the saddest words are, "This year is next year."

--- George F. Will.

There are twenty thousand people in the stadium and a million butterfilies.

--- Vin Scully, the longtime voice of the Los Angeles Dodgers, during the ninth inning of Sandy Koufax's perfect game.

Jesus is the Answer! What was the question? Who's Felipe and Matty's kid brother?

--- Graffiti in San Francisco, when the Alou brothers played for the Giants.

The fans love home runs, and we have assembled a pitching staff that will please them.

--- Clark Griffith, owner of the Washington Senators.Washington.

My idol was Bugs Bunny, because I saw a cartoon of him playing ball - you know, the one where he plays every position himself with nobody else on the field but him? Now that I think of it, Bugs is still my idol. You have to love a ballplayer like that.

--- Nomar Garciaparra.
.
I don't use foreign substances. Everything I use is made in the U.S. of A.

--- George Frazier, when accused of putting foreign substances on his pitches.

I'd love to be my wife for one day---so I can see how wonderful it is to be married to me.

--- Andy Van Slyke, center fielder and wit.

Hell, Killebrew was lucky. If I had to face our pitching staff, I'd have hit ten.

--- Dick Stuart, Boston Red Sox, after the 1963 season ended in a set between the Minnesota Twins and the Red Sox and all that was left for either team was to see whether Harmon Killebrew---who hit a few bombs during the series---or Stuart (who hit a couple fewer) would end up the American League's home run champion. (Killebrew won the race.)

Forget it. You guys are trying to figure out in fifteen minutes what nobody figured out in fifteen years.

--- Yogi Berra, happening in on a meeting of American League All-Star pitchers as they began discussing how to pitch Stan Musial.

No. Leave me alone. I want to spend ten minutes in the same place with this guy without him busting up a ball game on me.

--- Casey Stengel, touring Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum in England, visiting its baseball exhibit, and coming upon a wax likeness of Musial, when urged by a member of the Yankees' touring party to move along and not hold up the lines. (Stengel had managed the Boston Braves in the early 1940s . . . ).

Can you imagine finding Jesus Christ in Las Vegas?

--- Belinsky, who converted to Christianity while working for an automotive distributorship in Vegas, a few years before he died of a heart attack brought on by a battle with bladder cancer.

I only won 28 games in the big leagues and I bet I got more mileage out of that than Steve did with three hundred wins.

--- Belinsky, after appearing at an autograph show seated next to Hall of Fame lefthander Steve Carlton.

Tommy John versus Don Sutton. If anyone can find one smooth ball from that game, they ought to send it to Cooperstown.

--- Unknown sportswriter, after a game between the Yankees and the Angels, pitting suspected spitballers Tommy John and Don Sutton against each other.

Sandy has only two flaws. He can't park, and he can't hit.

--- Whitey Ford, after the 1963 World Series---in which the Dodgers swept the Yankees (and Koufax had beaten them twice)---when Koufax was awarded a spanking new Corvette as the Series' most valuable player . . . and found a $15 parking ticket on the windshield, because Sport (which awarded the prize) had had the car parked on the sidewalk outside the banquet where Koufax was presented the award.
.
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In 1967 I set a major league record for passed balls, and I did that without playing every game. There was a game, as a matter of fact, during that year when [knuckelball specialists] Phil Niekro's brother and he were pitching against each other in Atlanta. Their parents were sitting right behind home plate. I saw their folks that day more than they did the whole weekend . . . .

[T]his conglomeration of greats that are here today, a lot of them were teammates, but they won't admit it. But they were. And a lot of them were players that worked in games that I called. They are wonderful friends, and always will be. And the 1964 World's Championship team. The great Lou Brock. And I remember as we got down near World Series time, Bing Devine, who was the Cardinals' general manager at that time, asked me if I would do him and the Cardinals, in general, a favor. And I said I would. And he said, "We'd like to inject you with hepatitis. We need to bring an infielder up" . . .

I had a great shoe contract and glove contract with a company who paid me a lot of money never to be seen using their stuff.

Bat orders? I would order a dozen bats and there were times they'd come back with handles at each end. You know, people have asked me a lot of times, because I didn't hit a lot, we all know that, how long a dozen bats would last me? Depending on the weight and the model that I was using at that particular time I would say eight to ten cookouts.

--- Bob Uecker, during his Hall of Fame induction speech. (He was inducted as a broadcaster.)

-----------

Bet you didn't know:

We tried everything. Fastballs, curveballs, inside, outside, nothing worked. Bob Uecker owned Sandy Koufax.

--- Jeff Torborg, a Koufax catcher, remembering how the Hall of Fame lefthander would sweat trying to find ways to get the light-hitting Uecker out---Bob Uecker, of all people, owned a .400 batting average against Koufax in 1965.
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=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: youtube.com

Image: up2.podbean.com

NFL FOOTBALL QUOTES

Rants and raves by NFL football coaches are presented on video

10 Most Memorable Rants by NFL Head Coaches

Click here to view ===> NFL FOOTBALL RANTS

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: youtube.com

SPORTS QUOTES
Famous sports one-liner quotes are presented on video
.
The very famous press conference speech about basketball
practice by Alan Iverson is presented first in the video.
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Click here to view ===> TOP 10 SPORTS QUOTES ON VIDEO
=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: amiright.com

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Image: ec2.images-amazon.com
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BOWLING HUMOR \ SONG
Parody of Proud Mary written for a bowling manager
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Click here to view ===> SONG PARODY FOR A BOWLING MANAGER
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Proud Mary is a classic tune from the R & R era
of U. S. music history and is familiar to most
music fans, however, some seniors and many
youngsters 40 and under may have never heard
its pulsating rhythms before.

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Accordingly, for that group of music listeners,
Tina Turner's version of Proud Mary has been
chosen to provide the sound \ tempo for those
wishing to sing the Proud Mary parody.
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So, Tina, along with a megastar celebrity guest,
while appearing on Oprah Winfrey's show, sings
Proud Mary for your listening pleasure.
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Click here to view ===> TINA TURNER SINGS PROUD MARY
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Source: youtube.com
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===============

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: democraticunderground.com

Image: 3.bp.blogspot.com

SPORTS QUOTES

Quotes by and about high school coaches

Don't kick it to (name)!!!!
I heard this the whole week of our big rivalry game. It never dawned on me to ask what (name)'s number was ...until I got out on the field in a deafening roar. He was number 9.

Click here to view ===> SPORTS QUOTES

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: 3rddegree.net

SOCCER QUOTES
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There’s still 45 minutes to go – for both sides, I would guess.”
--- Brian Marwood
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“Players who have more great games than other players are the great players.”
--- Graeme Souness
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“It should be a good match because they’re a good football team as well and we’re a good football team. It should be a very good match.”
--- Peter Taylor
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“If Plan A fails, they could always revert to Plan A.”
--- Mark Lawrenson
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“We started poorly, we finished poorly and we were poor in the middle. Even when we were 1-0 up after five minutes I knew it was a disaster waiting to happen.”
---Bournemouth player/coach Peter Grant
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Click here to view ===> SOCCER QUOTES
===============

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: greatesthockeylegends.com

HOCKEY QUOTES
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Top Ten Quotes by Don Cherry
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On his love of clothes:
"Even then (in the early days), I had the best suits and best shirts.
I always looked sharp. The kids didn't have shoes, but I always looked good."
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Click here to view ===> HOCKEY QUOTES
===============

Monday, October 19, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: See message body

Image: blogs.palmbeachpost.com
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SPORTS TRIVIA \ QUOTES
Concussions impact severely on athletes in all contact sports
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Introduction:
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“Comedy is tragedy that happens to other people.”
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Source: Angela Carter \ whatquote.com
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--------------
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Comedy:
NFL football quote:
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When he didn't remember our anniversary, I knew he was OK.
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Lisa McCaffrey, wife of Denver Bronco wide receiver Ed
McCaffrey, on his latest concussion.
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Source: home.hawaii.rr.com
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-------
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Video:
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Red Skelton, in his 50's TV show, as Cauliflower McPugg,
a "punch-drunk" fighter who never won a fight.
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Click here to view===> CAULIFLOWER MCPUGG
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Source: youtube.com
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Tragedy:
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Brain injuries in boxing:
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Click here to view ===> CAULIFLOWER \ BOXING
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Source: time.com
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Concussions in sports \ Sports Legacy Institute (SLI)
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Click here to view ===> SLI AND CONCUSSIONS IN SPORTS
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Source: sportslegacy.org
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-----------------
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Editor's note:
.
This post is for information only and not
for profit or compensation of any kind.
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=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: foxnews.com

BURT REYNOLDS OPTED FOR MOVIE CAREER

AFTER SUSTAINING A COLLEGE FOOTBALL INJURY

Image: ecx.images-amazon.com

SPORTS TRIVIA

Celebrities \ stars who were jocks brfore starting new careers

Click here to view ===> STARS WHO WERE JOCKS SLIDE SHOW

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FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: public.shns.com

SPORTS TRIVIA
A sports blogger shares his list of great sports upsets.
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-- Y.E. Yang beats Tiger Woods
Yang was ranked 110th in the world. His best finish at a major had been a tie for 30th, and that was the only time in four previous majors he even made the cut. Meanwhile, Tiger was 14-0 when leading after three rounds in a major and had won 36 of 37 tournaments overall when he took a lead into the final round. But Yang played the final 49 holes in 13-under par, and not only did he overcome a two-shot deficit to Woods heading into Sunday, he ended up winning by three shots.
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-- Jack Fleck beats Ben Hogan
Before Sunday, the 1955 U.S. Open probably held the distinction of the biggest upset in golf history. Fleck was just a driving range pro when he decided to try to qualify for the PGA Tour. Six months after he made the tour, he found himself in an 18-hole playoff with the legendary Hogan. Fleck played the round of his life, shooting 69 at the Olympia Club in San Francisco -- three shots better than Hogan. Fleck would go on to win just two smaller tournaments on the PGA Tour.
.
-- Rulon Gardner beats Alexander Karelin
Karelin was a one-man dynasty in Greco-Roman wrestling. Going into the 2000 Olympics, Karelin had not lost a match in 13 years and had not given up a point in six years. But Gardner, the youngest of nine children from a farm in Wyoming, upset the Siberian Bear 1-0 to win the gold medal. Because of the sport, this upset often gets overlooked. But considering the circumstances, it ranks right alongside the 1980 U.S. hockey team's Miracle on Ice as, arguably, the greatest upset in all of sports.
.
-- Buster Douglas beats Mike Tyson
Iron Mike Tyson was one of the most feared men in boxing history and seemingly invincible when he took on Douglas in February 1990 in what was supposed to be a tuneup fight before he took on Evander Holyfield. Tyson was 37-0 with 33 knockouts. Douglas, who lost his mother to a stroke only 23 days before the fight, was 29-4-1 and a 42-to-1 underdog. But Douglas knocked out Tyson in the eighth round in what is regarded as the greatest upset in boxing history.
.
-- Upset beats Man o' War
Ever wonder why an underdog winning is called an "upset?" Many claim it was because of this horse race in 1919. Man o' War, one of the greatest thoroughbreds in history, won 20 of 21 races, once winning a race by an incredible 100 lengths and another by beating Triple Crown winner Sir Barton in a match race by 7 lengths. His lone loss came Aug. 13, 1919, when Upset, which had lost six times to Man o' War, held off the great horse to win by less than a length.
.
-- James J. Braddock beats Max Baer
When the two men fought in 1935 at Madison Square Garden, Baer was the heavyweight champ and Braddock was considered a journeyman. Baer, a 10-1 favorite, later said he thought of Braddock as a "chump." But in one of the greatest upsets in boxing history, Braddock stole the championship belt with a unanimous decision. So big was his victory that the great writer Damon Runyon called Braddock "The Cinderella Man," which also happened to be the name of the movie made 70 years after his shocking upset.
.
-- Robin Soderling beats Rafael Nadal
It's true that Nadal was fighting through a knee injury that eventually sidelined him for several months after the match. Still, Nadal had never lost a match at the French Open. He had won four straight titles and was 31-0 at Roland Garros. And he was playing a guy he personally disliked in Soderling, who was seeded 23rd and had never been past the third round in any Grand Slam tournament. But Soderling pulled off the upset in the fourth round, eliminating Nadal 6-2, 6-7, 6-4, 7-6.
.

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: laughitout.com

SPORTS HUMOR
Examination all athletes must pass to qualify for college sports eligibility
.
Test For College Athletes
.
Open Book.
Time Limit: 3 Weeks
.
1. What language is spoken in Russia?
.
2. Present a dissertation on the ancient Babylonian Empire, with particular reference to architecture, literature, law and social conditions;
-OR- provide the first/last name of God.
.
3. Would you ask William Shakespeare to
(a) sail the ocean (b) lead an army, or (c) WRITE A PLAY?
.
4. What religion is the Pope:
(a) Pakistani (b) Japanese (c) Agnostic (d) Is the Pope Catholic?
.
5. Metric conversion: How many feet are in 0.0 meters?
.
6. How many commandments was Moses given (approximately)?
.
7. What are people in America's far north called?
(a) Southerners (b) Not Southerners.
.
8. Six kings of England have been called George, the last one being George the Sixth.
Name the previous five.
.
9. Can you explain Einstein's Special Theory of Relativity?
(a) yes (b) no.
.
10. What are coat hangers used for, other than unlocking car doors?
.
11. Which part of America produces the most oranges?
(a) New York (b) Canada (c) Belgium (d) FLORIDA.
.
12. Where is the basement in a three-story building located?
.
13. Advanced math:
If you have three apples, how many apples do you have?
.
14. Where does the rain come from?
(a) The sky.
.
15. Essay:
In 20 words or less, list all of the words you know.
(HINT: These are words)
.
==================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: web.orange.co.uk

SPORTS QUOTES
A slide show of 10 sports quotes is presented for viewing.
.
"This is busting my balls and, if you didn't understand me well enough, I'll repeat - this is busting my balls"
- Italy's Fabio Cannavaro on his failed drugs test after using a banned substance to treat a wasp sting
.
Click here to view ===> SPORTS QUOTES SLIDE SHOW
=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: dangerhere.com

SOCCER QUOTES

Quotes by soccer commentator George Hamilton

”The midfield are like a chef………..trying to prise open a stubborn oyster to get at the fleshy meat inside.”

---- Reckon Keano would have got the hammer out.

.
“The orange tide is lapping against the green door which refuses to open.”

---- George is all at sea with this maritime metaphor.

Click here to view ===> SOCCER QUOTES

================

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: adventureliving.com

SKYDIVING QUOTES
.
"Anyone can fall out of an airplane; skydivers just do it right."
.
"It is one thing to be in the proximity of death, to know more or less what she is, and it is quite another thing to seek her."
-- Ernest Hemingway
.
Click here to view ===> SKYDIVING QUOTES
===============

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: viewfrommyseats.com

.
Image: 3.bp.blogspot.com
.
SPORTS HUMOR \ QUOTES
Trash Talking 101
.
The Ethics of Trash Talking
.
Click here to view ===> TRASH TALKING ETHICS
=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: amog.com

NOW THIS IS JUST THE REASON!!!

Image: datastore.rediff.com

NFL CHEERLEADERS PICTORIAL

A NFL fan identifies his ten favorite NFL cheerleading squads

Click here to view ====> NFL CHEERLEADERS (2008)

==================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: volleyballadvisors.com

...AND THE JEOPARDY QUESTION IS "BEST WAY TO COMPETE FOR THE SPORTS DOLLAR!"

Image: 2.bp.blogspot.com

VOLLEYBALL QUOTES

"No one has come here to be a tourist," "we have to play from the first ball to the last ball," "we must play 100 per cent in every game if we want to go to the finals."

–-Captain Nikola Grbic, Serbia Men’s National Team

"I am really happy and I can't express it in words, I just don't have the words. I will find the words some day."

-- Puerto Rican Hector Soto after selected to the top scorer in World Championships 2006

Click here to view ====> VOLLEY BALL QUOTES

==================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: facebook.com

DAN BYLSMA, HEAD COACH, PITTSBURGH PENQUINS

Image: blogcdn.com

HOCKEY QUOTES

Quotes by hockey coaches presented by forum members

My coach is possibly the greatest man alive. We were playing in the slot and the defenses were too close to the the goalie so..."you're sagging like a grandma's tits!"

And then my other coach, when talking about backchecking..."ride them down to the corner and then grind them into the boards"

Click here to view ===> 5 PAGES OF QUOTES BY HOCKEY COACHES

=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: coachk.com

"COACH K"

Image: sportsbusinessdaily.com
.
BASKETBALL QUOTES
Quotes from Duke's head coach, Mike Krzyzewski, "Coach K"
.
“Making shots counts, but not as much as the people who make them.”
.
“A common mistake among those who work in sport is spending a disproportional amount of time on “x’s and o’s” as compared to time spent learning about people.”
.
“I don’t look at myself as a basketball coach. I look at myself as a leader who happens to coach basketball.”
.
“Turning down the Lakers was tough, but it is always good to renew your vows to the loves of your life.”
.
“Believe that the loose ball that you are chasing has your name on it.”
.
“You have to work hard at staying in contact with your friends so that the relationships will continue and live on… Friendships, along with love, make life worth living.”
.
“In our program, the truth is the basis of all that we do. There is nothing more important than the truth because there’s nothing more powerful than the truth.
.
“In leadership, there are no words more important than trust. In any organization, trust must be developed among every member of the team if success is going to be achieved.”
.
People set rules to keep from making decisions.”
.
“There are five fundamental qualities that make every team great: communication, trust, collective responsibility, caring and pride. I like to think of each as a separate finger on the fist. Any one individually is important. But all of them together are unbeatable.”
.
“You develop a team to achieve what one person cannot accomplish alone. All of us alone are weaker, by far, than if all of us are together.”
.
“Two are better than one if two act as one.”
.
“A leader has to be positive about all things that happen to his team. Look at nothing in the past as failure.”
.
“People want to be on a team. They want to be part of something bigger than themselves. They want to be in a situation where they feel that they are doing something for the greater good.”
.
========================

Saturday, October 10, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: imdb.com

Image: 4.bp.blogspot.com

WRESTLING TRIVIA \ QUOTES

"The Wrestler" is a sports movie that provides a

behind-the-scenes look at the professional wrestling

lifestyle in America

Plot Summary for The Wrestler (2008) :

.
This is a drama about an aging professional wrestler, decades past his prime, who now barely gets by working small wrestling shows in VFW halls and as a part-time grocery store employee. As he faces health problems that may end his wrestling career for good he attempts to come to terms with his life outside the ring: by working full time at the grocery store, trying to reconcile with the daughter he abandoned in childhood and forming a closer bond with a stripper he has romantic feelings for. He struggles with his new life and an offer of a high-profile rematch with his 1980s arch-nemesis, The Ayatollah, which may be his ticket back to stardom.

Written by Matlock-6

Click here to view ===> THE TRAILER FOR THE WRESTLER

Quotes from The Wrestler:

Randy 'The Ram' Robinson: Hey, this is supposed to say 'Randy'.

Wayne: I guess personnel just got it off your W-4.

Randy 'The Ram' Robinson: WAYNE!... Do I gotta wear it?

Wayne: No... you're special.

Randy 'The Ram' Robinson: WAYNE!... Can they fix it?

Wayne: Just wear the fucking thing, ok?

Click here to view ===> MORE QUOTES FROM THE WRESTLER

=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: ipatrix.com

SPELUNKING HUMOR
.
Click here to view ===> SPELUNKING HUMOR
==================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: gotpoetry.com

Image: scientificblogging.com

HIKING POEM \ HUMOR

Click here to view ===> HIKING FROM HOME

=================

Friday, October 9, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: whoateallthepies.tv

SOCCER PICTORIAL
.
Quote from the source web site:
.
Top 50 soccer goals on YouTube video
I love ’soccer goals’, especially when they are as good as this 50.
A great way to kill 22 minutes of your lunch hour.
.
Click here to view ===> TOP 50 SOCCER GOALS (NO AUDIO!)
=================

Thursday, October 8, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: weburbanist.com

NOW THIS IS JUST THE REASON.

JANET, PLEASE!

NOW YOU'VE MADE ME LOSE MY TRAIN

OF THOUGHT AGAIN!

.
Image: media.nowpublic.net
.
SWIMMING HUMOR
.
14 Super Places to Swim: From the Bizarre to the Beautiful
.
"It’s been said, Don’t wait for your ship to come in – swim out to it. This positive slant on the big picture of life is something that swimmers can really get into. Across this world, there are thousands upon thousands of places to swim. It’s good for your health and good clean fun. But if you are bored of ordinary swimming pools, there are too many other unusual or cool places to swim that are far from dull to keep you happy and entertained. Consider a bit of travel to visit theses 14 places to swim, from the bizarre to the beautiful."
.
Click here to view ==> SWIMMING HUMOR
================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: thoughts.forbes.com

.
Image: ignaciobikeweek.com
.
SPORTS QUOTES

Rodeoing is about the only sport you can't fix. You'd have to talk to the bulls and the horses, and they wouldn't understand you.

--Bill Linderman

God does not charge time spent fishing against a man’s allotted life span.
--American Indian Proverb
.
In America, it is sport that is the opiate of the masses.
--Russell Baker
.
Baseball: Almost the only place in life where a sacrifice is really appreciated.
--Mark Beltaire
.
Academy: A modern school where football is taught.
--Ambrose Bierce
.
We have not made cricket and football [soccer] professional because of any astonishing avarice or new vulgarity. We have made them professional because we would have them perfect. We have dedicated men to them as to some god of inhuman excellence. We care more for football than for the fun of playing football.
--G.K. Chesterton
.
So you wish to conquer in the Olympic Games? But first mark the conditions and the consequences. You will have to put yourself under discipline; to eat by the rule, to avoid cakes and sweetmeats; to take exercise at the appointed hour whether you like it or not, in cold and heat; to abstain from cold drinks and wine at your will; in a word, to give yourself over to the trainer as to a physician.
--Epictetus
.
I played golf some time ago with John D. Rockefeller. The other day, I played with Charles M. Schwab.... Both played exactly the same. Neither overreached [or] tried to do more than he was capable of.... Most golfers, like most businessmen, swat the ball with all their might and trust more or less to luck as to the result.... Now, both Rockefeller and Schwab hit a straight ball nine times out of ten. In fact, in the first 17 holes I played with Schwab, he didn’t foozle a single shot. I could drive a ball 25 to 50 yards further than he, but quite often it flew wild. The result was that Schwab licked me decisively.
--B.C. Forbes
.
He who spends all his life in sport is like one who hears nothing but fringes and eats nothing but sauces.
--Richard Fuller
.
Bullfighting is the only art in which the artist is in danger of death and in which the degree of brilliance in the performance is left to the fighter’s honor.
--Ernest Hemingway
.
Father always emphasized being a good sportsman. Lose as if you like it, and win as if you were used to it.
--Thomas Hitchcock
.
Two things only the people anxiously desire, bread and the Circus games.
--Juvenal
.
Football today is far too much a sport for the few who can play it well; the rest of us, and too many of our children, get our exercise from climbing up the seats in stadiums, or from walking across the room to turn on our television sets.
--John F. Kennedy
.
We are inclined to think that if we watch a football game or a baseball game, we have taken part in it.
--John F. Kennedy
.
Ideally, the umpire should have the integrity of a Supreme Court justice, the physical agility of an acrobat, the endurance of Job and the imperturbability of Buddha.
--Time Magazine
.
When he says ""Sit down!"" I don’t even look for a chair.
--Player (about Vince Lombardi)
.
I don’t think I can take seriously any game that takes less than three days to reach its conclusion.
--Tom Stoppard
.
Most sorts of diversion in men, children and other animals are an imitation of fighting.
-- Jonathan Swift
.
=============

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: news.bbc.co.uk

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Image: sharonchristiansen.files.wordpress.com
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SPORTS QUOTES
.
"Well, he just can't stop scoring!"
~ Ken Bates on the arrival of striker Lucianno Becchio's baby daughter.
(Oliver, Malton).
.
"I'm only here because the ticket was free."
~ Spotted at Home Park during Plymouth v Nottingham Forest.
(Andy, UK).
.
"Who kicked the dogs out? Who who who who?"
~ At rugby league's NRL Major semi-final where the
Parramatta Eels defeated the Canterbury Bulldogs.
(Michael, Australia).
.
Click here to view ===> SPORTS QUOTES
=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: dailymotion.com

RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL

HOST FOR THE 2016 SUMMER OLYMPIC GAMES

Image: listverse.files.wordpress.com
.

OLYMPICS PICTORIAL

Brazil presents a video tour of its sports sites for the 2016 Olympics

The 2016 Olympics will be the first Olympics games

ever hosted by a South American country, so Brazil

has offered a brief video tour of Olympics 2016 sports

sites for your education and entertainment.

Click here to view ===> TOUR OF 2016 OLYMPICS SITES IN RIO

=================

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: youtube.com

Image: rivalart.com

TRACK AND FIELD QUOTES

Running quotes are presented on 2 separate videos

Click here to view ===> RUNNING QUOTES VIDEO #1

-----------------------------

Click here to view ===> RUNNING QUOTES VIDEO #2

=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: eastsideboxing.com

Image: ecx.images-amazon.com

BOXING QUOTES

Quotes cited by members of a boxing forum

Harry Greb, on being asked why he didn't keep his dressing room door locked:

"What, and stop some piece of skirt from getting in."

"Well, what the fuck was that?"

Dave 'Boy' Green after being KO'd by Sugar Ray Leonard

"You guys better get your commercials in quick. I can't hold this bum up any longer."

Ali, talking mid fight against Henry Cooper.

"Don't let him hit me again."

Kingfish Levinsky, talking to the ref during the Louis fight.

"He said I hit him when he wasnt looking. Well, what the hell, why aint you looking"?

Dempsey talking about the Sharkey fight.

"Keep em up Max" [Braddock to Baer]

"Is that up enough? " [Baer, after landing a head shot]

"Yeah, that 's fine " [Braddock].

Click here to view ===> 4 PAGES OF BOXING QUOTES

=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: wildsound-filmmaking-feedback-events.com

LINGERIE FOOTBALL

Image: 3.bp.blogspot.com

SPORTS PICTORIAL \ QUOTES

Web site presents a variety of sports clips for sports fanatics

The intro to the sports video portfolio has

to be the Lingerie Football video because

even sports fanatics have never seen a

sports video quite like this one - there is

serious eye candy here, so....

Youngsters: ADULTS ONLY, OK!!!

Seniors: WATCH YOUR TICKER, OK!!!

"LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!"

Editor's note:

After you click on the link below, scroll to the site's video.

Click here to view ===> LINGERIE FOOTBALL UNLEASHED!

-----------------------------

Still with us?

Ok, next is the sports fanatics dream:

SPORTS CLIPS GALORE - ENJOY!!!

Editor's note:

After you click below, scroll to the site's video to view selection.

Also note NFL week 1 and Oregon videos are not available for viewing.

Click here to view ===> STUNNING ARRAY OF SPORTS CLIPS

=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: funnytimes.com

SPORTS HUMOR
Relevant cartoon humor for the sports fanatic
.
Click here to view ===> SPORTS CARTOON HUMOR
==================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: smallmarketsports.com

Image: funnytimes.com
.
SPORTS HUMOR
Relevant cartoon humor for the sports fanatic
.
Click here to view ===> SPORTS CARTOON HUMOR
=================

Monday, October 5, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: asylum.com

CRICKET QUOTES
Asylum.com presents its all-time greatest cricket sledges
.
Bill Woodfull vs Douglas Jardine (1932-33)
.
As Australian captain during the infamous Bodyline English tour of Australia, Bill Woodfull had to manage incredible tension between his team and the English heroes cheats.
.
Englishman Douglas Jardine may have been ruthless on the field, but he couldn't take an insult.
.
After complaining to Woodfull that a slips fielder swore at him while at bat, Woodfull asked his compatriots:
.
"All right, which one of you bastards called this bastard a bastard?"
.
Click here to view ===> CRICKET QUOTES
=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: asylum.com

NOW THIS IS JUST THE REASON! MADONNA, PLEASE! NOW YOU'VE MADE ME LOSE MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT AGAIN!!!

.
Image: miragebookmark.ch
.
CRICKET HUMOR
Cricket and sex are combined by Asylum.com for your entertainment.
.
Kudos first to the eye candy police:
.
The man loves danger and sport. That is why he loves woman, the most dangerous of all sports.
Nietzsche, Friedrich
.
Source: quotationsbook.com
.
So, there's the quote to justify the following display
of completely unleashed eye candy.
.
And here is the alert to youngsters: ADULTS ONLY!!!
(That is for the eye candy police also.)
.
And here is the alert to the very senior members:
REMEMBER YOUR HEART, "OLD FOLKS"!!!
(Again, for the eye candy police)
.
SPORTS QUOTES?
Not this time - it is eye candy time!!!
.
There are some lady athletes and references to
sports and sightings at sports arenas, so that
should suffice for the sports aspect.
(You know the deal - this is for eye candy police!)
.
LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!
.
Click here to view ===> EYE CANDY UNLEASHED! NOW LET US PRAY!

-----------------------------------------------

MORE EYE CANDY FROM THE SUPERSTAR HERSELF, MADONNA!!!

That's right! With her superstar singing voice, now also enjoy her music video:

Click here to view ===> MADONNA SINGS !

Source: youtube.com

.
JUSTIFICATION FOR THE MADNESS:
See Nietzsche's quote above
(Last tip of the cap to the eye candy police! )
.
Rememeber this is a sports humor site, amigos!
.
Have a good day!!!
.
====================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: findarticles.com

SPORTS QUOTES
Selected one-liner quotes for coaches
.
The only time to recruit big, slow athletes is when you're coaching a tug-of-war team.
.
Never ask anyone who isn't a role model to act like one.
.
Anytime a coach tells you he never choked anyone in his life, go to the videotape.
.
Click here to view ===> SPORTS QUOTES FOR COACHES
=================

Sunday, October 4, 2009

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: sunstar.com.ph

Image: zazzle.com

TENNIS QUOTES

Quotes cited from a tennis one-liners book

“Tennis is like marrying for money. Love means nothing.”

—Phyllis Diller

“I’m trying to be a good guy, and I’m not that good a guy.”

—John McEnroe, on attempting to stop his tantrums

“I’m trying to kick your ass. In a nice way.”

—Pete Sampras, on his on-court philosophy

=================

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: home.pon.net

BASEBALL HUMOR
.
You might be a baseball nut if…
.
You subscribe to Baseball Weekly during the off-season.
.
You go to amateur ballgames (Little League, softball, etc.) even though you don’t know anyone on the teams.
.
Many of your summertime meals seem to consist of $6 hotdogs, $5 nachos and $4 cokes.
.
You’re still looking for that Todd van Poppel rookie card.
.
The last time you flew across country you planned a stop in Chicago so you could go to Wrigley Field.
.
You own a copy of the Official Baseball Rulebook. And you understand the Infield Fly and Balk rules.
.
You’ve ever scored a game.
.
You’re still carrying on a feud with your neighbor over whether Ichiro should have been eligible for Rookie of the Year.
.
You know who pitched the seventh game of the ’68 World Series.
.
You have Spring Training season tickets.
.
Your spouse asks where you’d like to go on vacation this year and you say, "Boston, Baltimore, Cleveland and Detroit."
.
=====================