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BASEBALL QUOTES
Quotes cited in July, 2007
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Late-night quote of the half year (2007)•
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No. 7 on David Letterman's list of Top Ten Ways Paris Hilton Is Preparing For Jail:
"Attending Tampa Bay Devil Rays games to get used to solitary."
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The five funniest quotes of the half year (2007)•
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Fifth prize:
From Cubs closer Ryan Dempster, on what Lou Piniella said to him during an especially brief April trip to the mound: "'
He said I looked good in my pants, which was nice. I hadn't noticed."
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• Fourth prize:
• Fourth prize:
From Giants manager Bruce Bochy, after witnessing the hero's welcome that one-time Red Sox October icon Dave Roberts got on his return to Boston:
"I was hoping to get on his float from the hotel to the ballpark."
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Third prize:
Third prize:
From Reds reliever Todd Coffey, to the Dayton Daily News' Hal McCoy, on whether there was any air conditioning in the bullpen in Philadelphia on a 96-degree night:
"There is no air conditioning and no electric fans. The only fans out there are full of hot air."
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• Second prize:
• Second prize:
From Twins utility wit Jeff Cirillo, on why he decided he'd better go for arthroscopic surgery on his knee:
"It feels like I have a little person down there playing a little guitar on it."
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• First prize:
• First prize:
From legendary quote machine Andy Van Slyke, to Booth Newspapers' Danny Knobler, on what he thought of Tigers pitcher Jeremy Bonderman's journey to first base for an infield single that was the first hit of his career:
"I've never seen an athlete get to first base hyperventilating. Even a poker player should be able to run 90 feet without hyperventilating. I thought I was going to have to revive him. I told him, 'I know CPR, but I'm not going to perform it on you.'"
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Quote we can't figure out why we love•
Quote we can't figure out why we love•
From the Mets' Carlos Delgado, on his reaction to being informed that his May 9 homer into San Francisco's McCovey Cove gave him more Cove shots than any visiting player (three):
"Useless information."
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