SPECIAL EDITORIAL NOTE FROM SPORTS_NUT, 2/26/2011
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Welcome to the retirement edition of Funny Sports Quotes.
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The Funny Sports Quotes blog was created in 11/2007 after I could see I could become a blogger very easily using Google's 3-step process for creating a blog online.
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For me, like most, work is not my idea of a fun experience, so I had to choose the topic that I would most enjoy pursuing and that, for me, was finding and posting funny sports quotes for entertaining and, in some cases, educating an audience on facets of sports even the most ardent sports fans may not have been aware of.
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At the same time, I decided to compile a database of funny sports quotes that sports fans and quote fans could visit for "one-stop" shopping, thereby helping them to avoid the need to search elsewhere for sports quotes.
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So, from 11/2007 until 2/2011. I have compiled quotes on the Funny Sports Quotes blog and its sister blog, FSQuotes, that is accessible only from the Funny Sports Quotes blog.
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As of 2/26/2011, I believe I have achieved my objective first set in 11/2007, which signals for me the end of my funny sports quotes database project.
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Kindly note that I have already made the last post (SI Swimsuit) to the blog, shut off further entries to Comments, and I will shut off the email address sports.quotes@gmail.com on 03/14/2011.
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Also note that many features previously cited on this page have been removed, so that a bare-bones FSQ remains for your future reference.
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I do hope that my venture was successful in bringing a smile to your face or a skip to your step, since that was all FSQ was created for, your entertainment and pleasure.
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In closing, I wish you and yours, Godspeed!
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Sunday, August 24, 2008

FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES \ Source: midgetmadness.com

Image: walpeperr.blogspot.com
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MOTOR RACING QUOTES
Quotes from NASCAR \ sprint car racing forum
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Here's a list I have from various message boards ... ect. On a few I've lost the authors of the quotes tho.
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Commenting on a new car. “It’s like taking a girl on a first date. You gotta keep playing with her to see how far she’ll let you go.”-Brian Tyler
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Wings are for airplanes, birds, and certain insects. Race cars should be powered by strong engines and controlled by a big pair of kahunas.
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When asked at Eldora....."Why do you race so close to the wall?"Jack Hewitt......"Cuz I ain't afraid of dieing"
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Racing is life, everything before and after is just waiting"-Steve McQueen
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“One other thing...to me, right now, there needs to be a mandatory drug test. ###### in the jar and get a pit pass, that's what they need to do. Being brave is one thing, but being brave cuz you ain't got the guts to do it naturally is another thing.”-Hewitt
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“Big ovaries will never be a substitute for big Balls,”-Hewitt
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"Some guys win with brains and some guys win with balls. The guy that wins the most is the guy that has the best communication between the two!"
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"If there were just 5 more laps we would have won that show"....
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"The driver ran out of talent about 25' before the crash began!"
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"How do you make a small fortune in racing? You start with a big fortune!!"
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"I drive race cars because I am to lazy to work and to honest to steal"-Brian Tyler
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If you lift for a second that’s where you'll finish"
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"There is no doubt about precisely when folks began racing each other in automobiles. It was the day they built the second automobile."
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”racing is a profession in which we sometimes forget the inherent risks, only to be offered the most awful reminder.”
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”It’s the emotional dichotomy that makes auto racing so fascinating, and yet so cruel. It's the ultimate win/lose situation, with the reality of its rewards and consequences.”
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"Iffen you don't like it, you can kiss my ######." AJ Foyt
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"You know, I learned quite a while ago that it's not racing that I love, it's winning," Jeff Gordon
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"there is a guy who is a real race driver...I wouldn't walk where he drives a race car”-Steve Kinser
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”The problem with being spectacular is that; you usually crash a lot of race cars”-Brain Paulus
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”I've never won a race, but I've never lost a party”-Delma Cowart
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“The one thing I am proud of is when I did crash; they were wadded up so bad you could’ve put them in the back of a pick-up. I always thought that if you were good, they’re totally destroyed when you crash, and if you’re a stroker, you can roll them onto the trailer and fix’em. When I crashed’em. I trashed’em.”- Doug Wolfgang
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”Cars and drivers win races; engines break track records” Keith Kuntz
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“Alcoholics can get help with their addictions. Drug addicts can also get help with their problems. But sprint car racing is an addiction for which there is no cure.”-Tom Chalk
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"if we racers ever decided to work as hard at somethingelse as we did at racing, we'd all end up millionaires."-Eddie Flemke
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”If you win races, you can win a championship, that's the way I look at, it’s not rocket science; there's no theories behind it.”-Tony Stewart
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” It amazes me how people want to make more out of it than what it is, It’s a fascinating sport, and it always boils down to one thing: trying to be faster”-Tony Stewart
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''Let's face it; no one would know me or Mario Andretti or Roger Penske if it wasn't for this place. This place is like the Kentucky Derby. You've got the Preakness and the Belmont, but they're not the Derby.''-A.J. Foyt
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"The walls are white, the track is grey, the grass is green, and the sky is blue...your job is to keep them all where they belong."-Johnny Rutherford
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"Drive it as hard and as deep as you can till you see God...then drive it 10 feet further...then brake"
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"There comes a time in every race where money doesn't matter, living doesn't matter, winning is all that matters.
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"It's like racing jet planes in a gymnasium."- on Anderson
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“They’ve got big hearts, and a whole lot of horsepower. Brave souls and the will to win. They’re the local heroes. And they LIVE for Saturday night.”-Dave Despain
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“Tonight it looks like we are bringing the car home in a wash basket.”
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"It got real quiet and I knew when it landed it was gonna hurt."
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"That's the 3rd time she's screwed me... and I haven't even kissed her yet!!"
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“I didn’t lift until I got into the ambulance".
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"Show me a GOOD loser and I'll show you a LOSER"
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“Yea, I've crashed a few of them but never going slow!”
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Winchester "you run'er down the straight away as hard as you can, then you spend the next 3 seconds trying to save your life"
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Anonyms commenting on sprint cars compared to stock cars-“the tires are twice as wide and the cars weight half as much"
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"Here beautiful (to trophy girl), take this home with you and I'll be by later to pick it up."
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"Our driver had brain fade".
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“When the front ends up that high ya, just follow the stars"
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"I get three screw-ups a year...that was one of them"
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“From the outside it cannot be understood, while from the inside it cannot be explained.”
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"There are three easy ways of losing money - racing is the quickest, women the most pleasant, and farming the most certain."
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